Ramblings of an (In)sane Snow Leopard
Crazy Like a Fox >:3 Oh, Wait...

Date: Friday, August 15th, 2014 - 12:44pm
Subject: Another Bunch of Updates
Security: Public
Once again, taking advantage of time I have while Jen's out to write about recent events and whatnot.

I'm getting tired of work. I know, I've said that too many times to count in the past, but lately, it feels kind of different. Day staff - not all day staff, but most of the people who have been there the longest - are just starting to collectively get lazy, and choose to stand around and talk or go outside and smoke when they should be doing actual work, and although nobody else has actually tried, it's generally accepted that they're not going to change. One example that still sticks out in my mind is a story Orlando told me last night. On Tuesday, Tom was in drive through, and had taken a 40+ dollar order. When the customer got up to the window, they informed him that they only had $40. It's slightly annoying when that happens, but fine, just ask the customer what they want to take off until reaching a desired total. I would presume Tom did just that, then informed the people on line (Manoah, Gabby, and Holly, I believe) of the changes. Either Manoah or Gabby then proceeded to irritatedly tell him that if he would "Stop cutting people off", "Repeat the entire order", and "Give the customer their total at the speaker", such incidents could be avoided. According to Orlando, however, Tom had done everything exactly as he should have. I know it's a pretty insignificant example in the end, but little things like that. Another quick thing from just last night could be how Mary stayed 'til 11pm - working a 14 hour shift in the process - because she believes / believed we've been giving out free food at night. It happens, yes. At the end of the night yesterday, Orlando asked if I wanted to make something to eat, and I declined, because all I wanted was the leftover bacon to make supper at home. The point I'm trying to make though is that we're coming back 'round to them being perfect, and everything being the fault of the night people. So far, the only thing that's changed has been Mary closing the dining room last night, but I can't stand working a 5 - close shift, and walking up front for some reason to see all the line (and possibly front cash) people standing in a circle talking.

Another point about work, specifically for me, concerns next week's schedule. It's not finished yet, so what I saw last night is still subject to change, but a new manager has been hired. For the rest of this schedule, she's working lunch shifts, but after that, will be moving to training on closes, with Mary. Sure enough, I'm still in on the nights I would normally close, so we're going to have three people, and after her training period is over, she indeed has a couple closes where it's just her and I. Now, fine. Maybe what I wrote about Orlando telling me that Mary said before is true, and I really am "more valuable" as just crew, but at the moment, I feel like more of just a convenience to have around. "Oh, I'm scheduling you to close on your own, but I'm giving you this other person to close with, and he's been here since Roy knows when, so if you have any questions, he can help!" As an added bonus, on the weekend after that (this schedule was still being figured out with pen and paper, so it's even more subject to change), I might end up having to close with Manoah Friday through Saturday. Is it wrong of me that I like the idea of telling Mary "I refuse"? ~23 hours having to listen to his inane ramblings about how he's god's gift to Taco Bell, and nobody understands what it's like for him... Go back to day shifts where people will actually tolerate you. I can only hope it's really busy those nights. Maybe I really am spoiled from always closing with Orlando nowadays. I don't say this out of spite, but it's nice to work with somebody who has roughly the same standards as you, and won't freak out .2 seconds after something doesn't go their way. I would say I should request a proper amount of time off, or to just not close for a week, but the problem with that is...

Money. I got paid nearly $800 yesterday, and I've already gone through almost all of it. "How?", you ask? Irresponsible spending, for the most part. I owed around $1,700 on my credit card, and that's the last time I intend to allow that to happen for a good long while. Of that amount, about $450 was from buying this new laptop. I knew that was coming way back the last time we got paid, but that was only a fraction of the full amount. ~$20 more came from Jen buying some games from the 3DS eShop, which she paid me back for right away. I took the money and spent it on other things, though. Another $300-$350 was CDs. Yes, CDs. A week or so ago, I discovered a new page with a bunch of Lapfox Trax CDs. A couple days later, I'd decided to go through with buying all of them, which, predictably, was well more than I assumed it would be. As a bonus, UPS decided I should have to pay about $45 in customs fees. Dad paid for those at the time, and I left $40 for him at the house yesterday, adding that if that wasn't enough, he could let me know, and I'd give him the rest next time I / we were over. There are two new CDs up on that page now, and I do want to buy them, but that's not going to happen for a couple weeks. Finally, Jen bought an iPhone. Or rather I bought an iPhone for Jen, and she's going to be paying me back over the next however long. So far as I understand as well, the only reason the phone was so expensive is because she had the account with Koodo set up in her name, therefore the credit check was done on her as well, and because she presumably doesn't have any credit... you can figure the rest out. It is fun to think that if things had been done in my name instead, though, she / I / we would've been able to buy the phone on installments. Alas, it's all done now, and she also decided to go for one year of Applecare and an OtterBox, bringing the total up to ~$900. It is all paid off on my end though. The remainder from my laptop, the cost for the CDs, and Jen's eShop games all came from my checking account. The phone, and related expenses, came from savings, which is now down to a dismal ~$6,400 (keep in mind, she and her mom have almost $5,000 from it), and I'll be damned if I don't want to take my entire next pay, and dump it all right back in there. I should at least start by putting the $100 Orlando gave me last night in my money box, and leaving it right there 'til next time Linda gives me money, so I can go to the bank with a more decent sum.

Getting away from work and personal problems, drama at the house is still going strong. The newest, and indeed most interesting development concerns Naomi's boyfriend, Ty (not sure of the spelling). Everybody has known for a while now that he'd be coming to visit so they could meet each other in person later this month. What Trish sprung on me yesterday, though, comes as quite a surprise. He's not just coming to visit; he's immigrating to Canada (from the states), and moving in! What gets me is how they can have such certain plans, yet Trish and Ericka have been hoping and trying to get approved for immigration for at least a full year now, and still have a little way to go. At any rate, I'm now responsible for sorting through absolutely everything that used to be in what used to be my room, because Ericka (and when they have to head back home, Adam) will be moving in there, and Ty will be taking Adam's room. I hope he likes the cramped quarters, and just... I don't know what to expect. They've literally only communicated online thus far, so while it would be understandable for him to come here (or I suppose for her to go there) to actually meet each other in person, it seems like a hell of a leap for him to be moving in virtually sight unseen. Oh, and I mentioned house drama, right? From what I've gathered, Dad doesn't want Trish and Ericka there any longer than they have to be. He doesn't want them out right away / as soon as possible, per se, but he doesn't want them to get too comfortable either. If that is really the case, how is it fair that he should feel that way toward them, but be fine with Naomi's boyfriend - again, having never even met him before - doing just the same? Interesting times are to come, I'm sure. Hell, we'll be there on the 19th for a last family supper before Trish and Ericka have to go back home (they leave on the 24th, and he arrives on the 25th, coincidentally), and sometime then, I intend to take Naomi and Adam aside and explain that the internet is going up to $20 a month for both of them. Adam's already paying that, and he even knows of my plans, but Naomi doesn't, and if what Trish and Adam have told me says anything, she won't take kindly to having to pay extra, even though money should be the least of her concerns.

With that, though, I'm at the point where I could continue writing if I sat here and thought for long enough, but I won't. There's a pile of dishes in the kitchen that will sadly remain there for probably the entire weekend if I don't do them now, and I need something to busy myself with until Jen gets home. No idea when that will be, but let's see how many I can get done~
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Date: Saturday, August 2nd, 2014 - 3:33pm
Subject: On Work and Creepy People
Security: Public
It's only 2:30, so I have some time to write, right? We're supposed to be going shopping later this afternoon (probably around 4 or 4:30), after we were originally supposed to go on Wednesday, only to have plans change, then it's off to work from 7 - close, which I suppose will be a shorter shift than starting at 5:00 yesterday. In regards to work, I know times past that the more I complain about it to myself or to other people, the less likely I am to actually do something, but ever more these days, I want to say something about Manoah, or effectively tell him to get his act together. The way I put it to Orlando last night was that I legitimately believe a large part of his work ethic is based on being able to get away with not doing things, or delegating them to other people. Fine, managers are supposed to delegate, but he closed Thursday night this week, and there was one point during that night when Tom needed some food on line, and Manoah, who was in the middle (where the hot food is kept), asked me (I was standing closer to drive through waiting for my order to be finished) to grab it for him. Another customer pulled up to the speaker right then, so I turned and went to take their order without another word, but little things like that get to me. As well, at the end of the night, there were still customers in line. Only a couple, but the second one needed a minute to decide what they wanted, as we were out of lettuce. Cue Manoah from way down at front cash yelling (actually angry yelling) at me to hurry up / hurry them up, because he was waiting. I responded that I was waiting too, and he countered with an incredulous "Excuse me?", and yeah. Honestly, I wish I could've completely switched my emotions off / set them aside, and replied back "I'm waiting too. I know we were supposed to be closed at 1:00, but every single person here who has ever closed even just once knows that we can't close until the last customer has been served and has left the drive through. Manoah, though... he's too attached to the status quo. If even the smallest thing is deviating from what he expects in a way that personally inconveniences him, his mood takes a drastic turn. I've thought about taking him aside in the office / out back or whatever and telling him "I don't like the way you work", or asking to talk to both him and Mary at the same time, but in a way, by not having said anything (so far as I know) thus far, she's just enabling him. I suppose the next logical step would be to take it to Mike (the district manager), but odds are all he'll do is tell Mary to get it sorted, and nothing will change. I know there are other people higher up than any of them that I could take such concerns to, but I also know that if I do, the first thing they'll ask is "Have you talked to the person you're having a problem with about your concerns?", and... in the end it's just easier to keep trying to not get too hung up about it. Otherwise, it's just general laziness that's getting to me. During the three hours between 5 and 8 yesterday, I was on backups. I observed (through hearing them) at least two difference instances where Mary, Manoah, and Bonnie were just standing together on line laughing and talking, instead of bothering to stock up or clean. I don't know, though. Maybe I should be happy for what positives there are. Apart from calling in on Monday, I am getting pretty decent hours, am not currently actively disliked by anybody there, and, in a really superficial way, at least have the satisfaction of doing my job right and well, instead of just putting in a minimum of effort.

On the other side of things... Last night was on a whole a decent shift. I was able to get everything done that I wanted to over supper, and working with Orlando for the first time since Sunday was a nice addition. I have something more to look forward to tonight as well, being that on our way home last night, he said me might keep Tom on drive through 'til midnight, since he already said he wouldn't be able to stay and help past then. On a weekend night, I would prefer drive through over line, because it's more of a chance to get dishes caught up, but at the same time, it's quite entertaining to see Tom get all frustrated when he has to be on drive through for longer than expected. I had a moment of personal interest last night too, when Orlando was in the office, and I went back there to see what he was doing. On the desk were some keys, and one caught my eye, for being different than the rest. At the same time I was reaching out to pick it up, I asked him "What do we need a dimple key for around here?", because indeed, it was one of those, and when I picked it up to examine it more closely, found it was actually for a Mul-T-Lock Interactive lock (possibly redundant). Surely of no great interest to anybody else there, but I've read about / seen those online, so it was quite interesting to see one in person. Further questioning (with me playing with the interactive element all the while) revealed that they were in fact his keys, and that one was to the front door of his building, which was even more interesting. This building here uses a Medeco. That doesn't come as much of a surprise, especially now that I've been paying more attention when going into places, and seeing that nearly every business around here (except for work... we're stuck with Best...) uses them, but to know that there is in fact a place in this city that uses a completely different style of lock is indeed really cool. Also, now that I've been noticing more, I like how the office downstairs gets a Schlage, and every unit (that I've noticed so far) have just some generic sort. Hell, though. For all I know, they neither notice or care, so long as it keeps the door locked. Maybe I'm just weird. Oh, and on a related note, in the same night, Orlando discovered and showed me that Mary has a good 20 spare front door keys, and a bunch of others, including keys to tubular locks, even though I've never seen one used in or around the building. Just interesting, I suppose.

As for anything else... I've told this story to Jen, Linda, and Orlando already, but I'll tell it here too, just because of what happened. On Thursday night, I was walking home from work on my own, and ended up crossing to the other side of the street. Down near 7-11, a random guy came up behind me on his bike, and said something, which I didn't hear. I turned around while saying "Sorry?", and he said "Oh, you're not Dave". Apparently this Dave is somebody he went to high school with (PURPORTEDLY), and from there to just down near the bank, he proceeded to ask me if I was bi (I told him no), tell me he was looking for some action, and that he'd heard in the past that there were several people at work (he must have noticed my bag, since it has a big logo and all) that swung both ways, and such. One would assume that from my telling him no and not really seeming interested in making conversation, he'd leave me alone, but then, just about where the steps are that you can take to walk down by the river, he asked "So, do you still wanna go f---?", and I told him no, and that I "was good". He took off after that, and I was left having a very quick walk the rest of the way home. Maybe it wouldn't be that unusual an occurrence in a larger city, but here, I have never been approached like that, and hope to never have it happen again, because... people are creepy.

I suppose otherwise though, I should finish this up, as Jen is surely waiting anxiously to read it, and we're not going to be going anywhere until she does. I'll just be sitting here, waiting for her to look over with a smile and say "Indeed"~
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Date: Wednesday, July 30th, 2014 - 11:59am
Subject: Always Check the Power Settings...
Security: Public
I think having really taken to browsing /r/4chan in Thunderbird lately is starting to influence the way my thoughts come together just a bit, because I want to tell this story about recent laptop difficulties this way:

a livejournal greentext taleCollapse )

...yeah. I like the directness of that style of "writing", but it's certainly different. That about sums up everything up to now though. I'm going to be putting at least half my next pay toward paying for that, and cover the rest with our pay after that, but otherwise, I have a new laptop. Yay. This one's still in decent working order, I guess, but I was notified last night that the reason one of the hinges is kind of funny is because the hinge screw has completely snapped out, and I haven't even looked into why it'll just turn off if handled the wrong way. I anticipate it being at least a month before I've become accustomed to Windows 8 and transferred all the data from this laptop over anyway, so... it'll be a process. I suppose that's something else ongoing to keep me occupied. The bedroom is depressingly empty now that everything's out of there, and for all I know, that could be directly influencing some of the actual emotional state. There are still some things to be boxed yet, sure, but otherwise, it's being used exclusively for storage.

I should probably wrap this up soon though, because the update has just now asked to restart again, so I want to see what happens there. Perhaps the next time I write in here, it'll be from in Windows 8. That would be kind of neat~
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Date: Sunday, July 27th, 2014 - 1:55pm
Subject: A Start to Things Today
Security: Public
I'm not sure how much time I have to write before Jen gets out of the tub, but nevertheless, I'd like to be able to say a bit about things that have been happening recently before moving onto more productive tasks.

I had a slightly odd dream just before waking up... I was hanging out with a medium-ish group of people just outside the church on Sandys street here, waiting. Probably for our turn to go in, because I remember Dan was right there with me, and we were just casually chatting, but I was getting kind of bored, because we'd been sitting there for a few hours with no change. Just as I was contemplating heading home to spare myself any further boredom, a bunch of people came walking out of the church proper, which I took as a signal that it was our turn to go inside. Cut from there to being in an auditorium with a stage up front. Everybody was sitting on / around the stage, and we must've been waiting for food, because one person walked in a few minutes later carrying a bunch of pizzas. Things were kind of small, with more dough than pizza sauce / topping, but I produced a knife from somewhere, and set to cutting one into large pieces. I was aiming for six, and indeed, when I finished, there should've been six, but the top and bottom pieces (from my perspective) were really really small, and even though I hadn't seen anybody come up, one piece was already gone. Then I woke up, to find Jen still not on the couch, and wandered into the bathroom to discover her laying in the tub. I'm inclined to let her sleep until at least 3 again, if she can manage, but if he keeps it up, Conner's random outbursts are going to cut that short...

Anyway, things that are actually going on...

We got rid of our mattress several nights ago. Wednesday, to be exact. The final straw was going into the bedroom to put some things away, and seeing a new, disturbing development - several bedbugs crawling freely on the wall near the window. The blanket that had been hanging in the window to act as a curtain was promptly removed, and after much deliberation and trying to find the best way to move it, we wrapped the mattress itself in a comforter, and carried the whole lot outside. It does feel like a step in the right direction, because the bedroom is used more for storage than anything else these days as is, and because a majority of the bugs still have to be in the mattress, but that was only the beginning of the work. Since then, I've taken a few hours before work each day to go through everything in that room. Started with the dresser, then the main part of the closet, and now I have to go through the closet shelf, before continuing along to the window, then a little table that's in the corner, all the electronics that are on a bigger table in the next corner, and finally, the large shelf with a bunch of stuff on it. Thus far, we have about three and a half boxes of just stuff to be donated, and... yeah. It's nice to be doing that, because not only is it cleaning the room out so it can be fully vacuumed / steamed / bug dusted, it's also just getting rid of old stuff that's accumulated. I've said it in here at least once before, I'm sure, but my problem about things is exclusively thus: I see something while out shopping that I'll think looks cool, or which I'm sure I'll put to use, buy it, and then either completely forget that I bought it, or not put it to the intended use after all. Jen helpfully offered that there's really nothing wrong with buying things, and inevitably donating most of them when I find I have no space left, but I still feel like I could save more money by just trying to hold back. We'll see. The one difference with getting rid of stuff this time is that I'm hoping to sell some of it online. I bought a set of Necomimi ears a couple years ago, yes? Didn't really care for them about ten minutes after taking them out of the package. I intend to put an auction up on Furbuy, and all I have to do now is take pictures. Hopefully that's successful.

The other thing I want to touch on today is work. So far, this weekend is going alot better than last, which I'm quite thankful for. Keep it a secret, because I don't want anybody there to hear, but I'm considering calling in for my shift on Monday (5 - close, with Mary), so I can have a full day to completely finish going through the bedroom. Problem apart from the obvious with that is I'd feel kind of guilty after learning something on the way home last night. We are hiring right now, for both managers and crew, and for all hours. Mary has ten interviews lined up on Monday afternoon, so it'd be nice to get at least two new people from that. After mentioning that, Orlando told me how Tom is kind of understandably concerned about losing hours once new people start, but added that he feels I shouldn't have to worry about mine. I'm inclined to agree, because new people probably aren't going to be put on closes with just themselves and the manager right away, so that's good. You might be thinking to yourself though, "If they're hiring managers, why haven't they asked you?" I've wondered the same thing many times before, and eventually settled on this conclusion: I haven't been asked because my availability prevents me from opening, because I don't have a vehicle, or because I actually don't do my job properly in some serious, un-overlookable way. Last night, however, Orlando informed me of the actual answer. I have not been promoted because I am - he said in Mary's words - more valuable as a regular crewperson, being the strongest one there. Indeed, were I to become a manager, Tom would either have to step up to full-time closes, or they'd have to train somebody new completely from scratch. Also, Orlando added that on the same subject, the one person he feels should be promoted is the one person he doesn't want to see promoted. I have to think I'd be on full-time closes then, which would take those hours away from him, and neither of us would want that. The final thing he said before the subject changed is that still, if she's going to do that (keep me as regular crew for the sake that I'm more valuable there), she should give me a raise, but I have a feeling that won't happen if I don't ask her directly, and I'm well more inclined to just go with things as they are for now. It is just a nice position to be in, and I definitely like finally having a proper answer.

That will now be all I had to say today, so it's time to go find my camera and take pictures for that auction. I really hope it goes well, because I have some other things I'd like to actually sell off instead of just donating, but we'll see. I have a backup plan, anyway~
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Date: Monday, July 21st, 2014 - 2:25pm
Subject: Only One More Day...
Security: Public
I find myself using the word "nonsense" an awful lot when it comes to things about work lately. I know exactly what I'm actually thinking of - still eight letters, but it starts with a [B] instead - however, I'll just continue on saying and thinking what I have been already, as that's more like me.

Since Thursday, work has just really been getting to me. It doesn't help that I worked ~20 hours between Thursday and Friday alone, but looking back on those two days now, I have but one shift left, and then two whole days to do whatever I please with. Sleep in? That would be really nice. Go out shopping for a few things? Definitely. Have Evo (I really wonder if I could just start using his real name now...) over? So far as I know, we've already got plans for that too. All that sort of stuff still seems just slightly far away though.

See, there was something extra on top of our usual closing duties this weekend - an audit. An announced one, at that, so of course Mary wanted everything to look perfect, and I understand that. On Friday night, we stayed 'til about quarter to five (just guessing) doing some extra cleaning. Saturday kept us 'til five o'clock right on, because we pretty much had to do the same things as the previous night (the audit was planned for Sunday, and you can probably see part of the problem now), but there was also an added bonus. Tom, who was supposed to be done at midnight, stayed another two and a half hours, and I could've just about turned inside out with my seething little ball of unfairly-directed rage by the time he left. I suppose you could say what really mattered was accomplished - extra cleaning got done - so while Orlando and I were walking home, our mindset on the matter was just one of hoping the audit was completely done, and the auditor had already left by the time we got to work. When I went in the next day (Sunday) nothing seemed out of the ordinary, and nobody really said anything to me about how things went, so I assumed that they'd already either been there, or had yet to arrive. I didn't want to ask either way though, for the sake of leaving well enough alone. But then when Orlando came in, he did, of course, and I learned what really happened. The auditor went to some store in Windsor - one which was presumably unprepared for an audit, and didn't even have the GM working that day - and therefore wouldn't be in to see how things were for us until Monday. I'll skip the rest of the detailed rundown, and just say the following for now, while I'm sitting here, still yet to even get ready for work:

#] At no point did we receive any proper "thank you" or acknowledgement for doing extra cleaning. While I was waiting to change into my uniform on Saturday, Mary did ask if we'd been able to get anything done, but otherwise offered no words of appreciation. The one thing I did hear, to be fair, was Chris commenting about how they were just standing, staring at the boards earlier in the day, marveling at how clean they were. That was seriously a five minute job at best - scrub with some degreaser, and wipe dry with paper towel - but if they were actually impressed by that, I'll take it.

#] It's nice, if not an outright requirement for the general manager to be present when an audit is being conducted, yes? Such was the case yesterday, with Mary being there 'til 4 or so, but then they never showed up. I can't blame her for not wanting to come in again on Monday, Orlando has the day off, and Gabby is closing, so who would be the only manager actually there in the morning? Manoah. I suppose that's good, because he's the next best prepared and capable person after Mary, but his attitude toward Orlando and I could've been better. Back at ~5:00 yesterday, he asked both of us if we could please stay and do extra cleaning like we had the past couple nights again "tonight". I thought nothing of it then, but then he and Gabby proceeded to spend a good half hour just relaxing in the office reviewing resumes during suppertime, instead of putting their efforts toward getting some extra cleaning done then. There was and probably is still a leak in the ceiling of the staff bathroom. He pretty much told us to try and get up there and patch it with some duct tape (if that would even work), but we didn't. It was busy enough throughout the day already that it took us a full hour after closing to just get the dishes and everything else done. Even if I wanted to stay and get extra cleaning done yet again, do you think I, or even we are going to want to stay when nobody but us is expected to lift a finger to do so? No. We completed our regular closing duties as best as possible, and while I was busy in the back, Orlando cleaned out an area on mini that was becoming covered with dried nacho cheese, but that's it.

#] Hand-in-hand with the above, staying later on a regular basis would be alright if we knew we were getting paid for it. It already might be the case that we're having time taken off our total hours per pay period for breaks, but there's something else that was revealed to me through this weekend. I'm not sure what it takes to get into overtime, but let's say it's 80 hours. As of last night, I was at 71 hours and fifteen minutes. I worked an ~8 hour shift yesterday, which would change that to 79 hours (assuming I understand the way Mary does payroll), and then at least another 7 hour shift today, which would put me over. I have to think overtime pay is more than our normal wage or something, because here's what she does: takes however much extra time you worked after 80 hours, and adds it to your next pay. So you might already be thinking "What happens if you go into overtime then too?" It just rolls over onto the next one, and will keep doing so until you have enough shorter shifts or extra days off to make up for the extra time. In that case, the extra money would be nice, but shouldn't it be the other way around? Overtime or not, *breaks* or not, you get paid for exactly what you work? For the past good while, I haven't turned down a request to come in early, or in one case, to close on a day off, because Orlando had something come up. "It'll make for more money" I thought. Now, maybe I'm still not getting enough hours to where I'm at the point of being at overtime, but if I was, what would there be to do? On our way home last night, we were discussing just calling in on some shift, or just taking it really easy throughout the night. Orlando came up with a slightly unrelated idea to ask for a week of opens / day shifts, so Manoah could close and get a taste of his own medicine, adding that he would have to ask for me to not close that week either, because same as him, I have to deal with it night after night too. Maybe I should start to keep my clock in and clock out stubs like Tom does, so I can keep track of how many hours I'm working each day. Or maybe I should turn a blind eye to all of that, and just keep doing what I'm doing, for the sake of being happier. My last pay was almost $800, so that's well worth it, right? I'm just getting sick of it again. The money's pretty good, closing is still relatively easy, and I don't mind having to stay later here and there, but this weekend has just been too much of the bad things all at once.

#] Last one here. I'm getting tired of always being put on drive through. I can kind of understand where Tom's coming from now. Thursday, I was on it from 5 - close, which was 1 in the morning. Friday, I was able to wait 'til 10, Saturday, I was able to wait 'til 11, but then Sunday, I was back on from the beginning of my shift to the end again. Customers are still fine, with the exception of coupons, and those are mostly only annoying because there aren't coupon codes set up for the new set that are out now. Dishes, on the other hand, and being the only one that touches them for pretty much the duration of my shift, is something else. They were behind when we closed on Thursday, but Friday and Saturday were better, because Tom washed the majority of them then, but yesterday, when it was not only steady throughout the entire day, but Manoah and Gabby had time to review resumes (only to leave them for Mary, who wouldn't be in on Monday, guys!) on top of everything else they could've been doing is just... dumb. I wanted to write this entry so I could get alot of my frustrations out, and hopefully because of this, I can just focus on how I have the next two days off whenever I find myself frustrated during the night, but even still, I'm just ready to be done.

That should be about it for today though. We need to get the living room ready for Conner, because Jen's having a worker come over at ~3:30, and I need to get everything ready myself for work. One more day? Yes. Can I make it through based on this being my last shift this weekend? That's what I'm going to keep telling myself. The energy drink I intend to have in the walk-in should help as well~
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Date: Friday, July 11th, 2014 - 1:46pm
Subject: Things are Getting Bothersome Again
Security: Public
...so it's been a little while again, yes? I was tempted to write about some things last night, because I was in a blah mood after working a long day, but the more I think about it, the more it's going to derail the mood of writing if I try to go into detail about all of those. As a result, things that were / are (situation-dependent) still bothering me consist of the following:

a. A picture Jen was working on for herself last night makes me conflicted. I like it, because it of the way it looks, and is also *how* it is, but my brain just so happens to be filled with the exact combination of switches that get flipped through processing the small part I saw of it to cause anxiety as well.

b. Work is dumb. Mary told me I could start early if I wanted yesterday, so I got changed and clocked in for about 4:20, only to be on drive through 'til 1 in the morning. Turned out an alright (if long) night, but I'm still hoping for tonight to go differently.

c. For as long as I continue to lay down with Jen in the living room before I wake up and go to the bedroom, she rubs my back. It used to be nice, but last night, it was far more bothersome, after she previously pointed out that whenever I rub hers, I end up intentionally tickling her, when she rarely ever does the same to me.

There were a few others as well, but the seriousness of those seems to have diminished with having slept. The one that does remain, however, involves money. Back at the beginning of July, I noticed we'd be getting paid three times this month. From that point on, it was and still is my goal to have $1,000 in my checking account again by the end of it. So far, I've been sitting right around $500, which it pretty decent, and makes my goal seem nicely attainable. I did spend about $50 back on Tuesday or Wednesday, and another $20 out of my wallet at Wendys on Wednesday night, but you know what? That's fine. I see nothing wrong with giving myself a special treat on my days off, and it doesn't particularly affect my checking account. As of yesterday though, I'm down $300. What happened? I was doing so well, and I have to go find something expensive online or make a large purchase elsewhere to screw myself over? Not quite, thankfully. What happened is Linda wanted to borrow some money, and with the limited time I had, it was easiest to just take it out of my checking account. I intend to transfer that entire sum over from savings at some point this afternoon, so things are back to normal there, but that still doesn't really say what would have bothered me, does it? Her borrowing money is simply getting to be a real concern.

Look at it this way: once I add that $300 to my file of who owes me what, her total will be up to $3,600. In fairness to her, most of the time she wants to borrow money, it's for something related to her van, or for grown-up, non-frivolous expenses, but it's still piling up awfully fast. It's already been true, ever since I lent her money to buy the van, but she's literally borrowing faster than she can repay. I know she only gets a fixed amount of money each month. I know I can really only expect to *get* money from her at the end of the month. What I would *like* to know is if she realizes what kind of situation she's getting herself into where she'll pay me back ~$300, and then, in the case of this month, between two days (two! (although they were admittedly separated by six days)), borrow another full thousand dollars. Something needs to change, or come, say, December, I'm not going to have any savings left. The problem with saying that though is not seeing what could change, and yet, what would she have done before I came along? It makes me feel kind of physically off to think about, but if it's annoying for me, what would it be for her? What will it be for Jen, even, when she reads this? I imagine I'll probably be able to laugh about it in time, but for now, it's stressing me out. Was that much obvious?

As for any other things, I'm not sure there are any to mention now. I don't start 'til 8 tonight (although I did get called in early last weekend), so I could probably find something to do, but... I don't know what, yet. I was getting quite into Cinders the other day, but then accidentally clicked the wrong option, and hadn't saved in a while, so... yeah. 140 is pretty cool too, but I'm stuck on the third stage of the third "boss" right now, and... maybe I should find something to eat. I've had a few cookies and some juice today. Nutritious? Not really, but not a far cry from coming home last night, drinking some juice, and losing my appetite due to other things. Jen just woke up though, so I suppose I should finish this here. Maybe I'll add some more subreddit RSS feeds to Thunderbird first, because, you know, it's not bad enough that Thunderbird nearly locks up every 30 minutes to check for updates as is. When the program starts to freeze completely, I'll know that's too much~
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Date: Thursday, July 3rd, 2014 - 3:27pm
Subject: Today is Too Rushed
Security: Public
I... just wish I had more time before having to leave for work.

A week ago right now, I knew I had to start at 7, and was just sitting on the couch, pretty much as I am now, relaxing, knowing that I was done with Heart and Stroke until Fall. Today, however, is different, because of course it just has to be. I went to the house yesterday afternoon to consult Adam and Trish about internet-related things. They've been experiencing what they feel are unreasonable interruptions and quality of service, so I told them there was the option of upgrading to cable. Problem is, for set-up, purchasing a modem, and whatever other fees may be hidden alongside those, the first month would be a little over $200. They both agreed that they'd rather just stick with DSL, and that's fine. Unfortunately, it doesn't solve the issue of Naomi, but that's a whole different thing entirely. Because of her heart condition (or so I presume), she's on disability now. The main thing with that is it's made her even more firmly entrenched and set in her ways, insofar as that it's unreasonable (to the point of having a tantrum) to expect her to pay more than $10 a month for the internet, and probably many other things I don't know about / experience from not living there anymore. It's pretty obvious she has money, because I'm told she now has two laptops, a tablet, and an iPhone, but... the time has not yet come where I'm required or requested to come personally have a part in that.

Anyway, while I was at the house yesterday, Dad asked if I wanted to take his laptop home with me, to see if I could get it working. I said I could, but I didn't know how long it would take to fix, and his response was that it's just been sitting in the basement unused for at least a month now, so it couldn't be any worse than that. I cracked it open and had a look later on in the evening, and it turns out AVG was causing a bluescreen right before logon, so I rebooted into safe mode (after being helpfully reminded by Google that that was an option...), found a program to completely remove AVG on my own laptop, and ran that on his. Windows started up completely fine after that, and I probably could've just left well enough alone, but no, I had to go and try to uninstall programs that I felt were unnecessary. Fine at first, but when I had to reboot after uninstalling one of them, I was greeted with text saying "NTLDR is missing" and such. I ended up leaving it alone for the rest of the night, because Jen wanted to lay down, and today, I was able to get it back up and running thanks to this site, and as of right now, I'm backing up files so just in case there are any further issues, I can reinstall Windows without worrying about losing files he (Dad) might consider valuable. Oh, and for my own laptop, in updating my graphics card driver (via NVIDIA's own automated program), something went wrong, and I didn't realize for the better part of a week. Good thing this laptop has integrated graphics as well, and that certainly explains why the entire thing, including the hard board I have it on, was really hot.

All of that said, the reason I wish I had more time before leaving for work today is that I start at 5 instead of 7, and I just feel like I have so much to do, and not enough time to do it. I suppose the most pressing item would be replying to an email though. I should have plenty of time for that after this. Still, it's just... it feels like there's so much to do. From tonight, I work five closes in a row (and I sincerely hope they're not quite as busy as last weekend's were), have Tuesday off with nothing planned, but then on Wednesday, will be going out to Lucky In(n) for supper with Trish, Adam, and everybody else at the house. Linda and Mikey might even be coming, which would be fun, but after that, oh... it would be quite fun to go back to the house and just hang out with Adam and Trish again, but that would likely require asking Linda to watch Conner, and we've already asked the same of her twice in the last weekend. Oh, and now that I think of it, there might be something on Tuesday too... Jen wants to start walking some dog path that's over near her mom's house, as she wants to lose some weight. She wants to start that on Monday, after going to her mom's for supper, to which I'm invited, but because I work on Monday, I would rather push all that ahead to Tuesday. Go over there for supper (possibly buy a treat for dessert at Sobeys...), go for a nice evening walk afterward, and after that, perhaps even stop for some sort of treat on the way home. I meant to run that idea by her last night while we were laying and talking, but as it is now, I'll have to hope that she remembers reading about it when I get home from work tonight.

So that's pretty well where things have been recently. They're not particularly bad or anything, but there's just not enough sense of direction. For all I know though, being back to work and having very specific things to occupy my time for the better part of those five days will provide just that. By the time Monday comes, I could want nothing more than to just sit and not have to do anything again...
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Date: Wednesday, June 25th, 2014 - 1:11pm
Subject: Where Do These Come From?
Security: Public
It *is* ~12:40 already, and I *do* intend to go to Heart and Stroke today, but still, let's take a moment to briefly (or not so briefly) recount two short but bleeding weird dreams I had last night. Jen's also still asleep, I might add, and I don't want to wake her up just so I can tell her about them.

In the first, we were out here in the living room doing things as normal. It was later at night, and Jen was over doing things on her computer, while I was listening to music from some game at a rather loud volume on mine, and then there were noises from the hallway. Now, the way it actually goes on occasion is the people across the hall will start shouting and get into a heated argument and be generally unpleasant. What happened in the dream was something else though. There was a man's voice shouting something incomprehensible, as well as a kind of static-y noise. My dream state interpreted as the noise of shelves being tipped over / things being thrown around in that apartment, but in the hallway right outside our door instead, and it honestly scared me a little. It wasn't like the guy's anger was directed to whomever else was in that apartment, but just toward anybody in the area, and as such, he could easily have chosen to target us instead. The sounds just kept getting worse though, so I really started wondering and worrying what I could do. At some point during the dream / after I woke up slightly from it, I envisioned myself stepping out into the hallway and locking the door behind me, but who knows what that would accomplish. Anyway, I did wake up, after the static noise kept getting worse and worse, and you know what it ended up being? The fan at the end of the bed. I must've been moving around enough to come out of my sleep just enough to start hearing that noise, which of course got louder the more awake I got, eventually reaching that point in the dream, where I woke up entirely. Still quite unsettling, and after laying in bed for a bit and realizing it was just a dream, I came out here to stay with Jen for a few minutes, as the idea of that actually *happening* and her just being asleep on the couch was bothersome.

So that's one. Not entirely sure what might have prompted it, but whatever.

In the second, I was at work. Though I didn't *see* him at first, it felt like I was closing with Orlando, which makes sense considering he's almost always closing. There were no customers, and pretty much everything was caught up, so I was just standing looking out into the dining room, when I saw it. A van slowly drive in (yes, as in into the dining room) from the right, and ever so slowly continue driving through. Thinking about it now, the idea / feeling was kind of one of that they wanted to get some food, but when they saw that all the lights out there were turned off (which they were), they assumed we were closed, and kept driving. But that's where it gets better. They kept driving, and at the same slow pace, went straight through the window. I could hear the sound of it shattering and everything, but thinking once again, that was probably just noise from the fan transferring into the dream. I could see Orlando out in the dining room by that point, and we immediately started to freak out a bit as to what we should do. The idea of taping garbage bags up over the window crossed my mind, but that image was quickly replaced by something completely different. We were still at work, on the same night and such, but it was a little while later. We'd evidently decided to make the best of the situation, and were serving customers in the dining room even though it was after 11. I try to think about how I would react if that were to actually happen too, and I feel like I'd be more worried about just what to do with the window at the end of the night, but in the dream, I was far more annoyed with people being in the dining room and whatnot. They were so smug and unaware of how lucky they were.

Getting away from dreams now, there are other proper things going on today, but I still feel like I don't have much to say as I woke up only an hour ago. I'll be leaving for Heart and Stroke at about quarter-to, and hopefully actually have some work to do today (Michele was sick yesterday), and will stay there 'til 4. Normally 5, but I want to go to Giant Tiger for an item I saw in their flyer last night, then it's back home to shower and get all ready to go out for supper, because I got a message from Mom yesterday to say that Adam and Trish wanted to meet us at Glitters when Adam got done work. That didn't happen, because we didn't have enough time to prepare, or arrange having Conner watched with Jen's mom, but tonight is looking better, and that would be nice. After that, I hope we could go over there for a bit, because when I was there last week, they requested to borrow a Wii, and I have that all packed up now. I think the only thing I really dislike about today is how it's my second and last day off before heading back to work for 5 closes. I'm sure they'll be fine, but... I want time to do other things. Jen was taking a nap yesterday evening (around 5pm, which is understandable because she's had to get up really early several days in a row now), and I wanted to do something productive, so what did I decide on? Got the steam cleaner filled up and plugged in, and went to work on the mattress in the bedroom. Nearly four hours later, I'd killed close to ~60 bugs, and could really not believe I'd still been sleeping on that bed. Yes, it's good that I can manage, but watching them shoot out of the crevices my feet and hands would hang over was not pleasant. Despite all that as well, the room is still not clean to the point where Jen feels comfortable falling asleep in there yet, and so, on some day in the future, we're just going to clean. She suggested waking up at ~11 so we could just have the full day, and if that's what needs to happen, so be it. At this point, I wouldn't mind packing up all the electronics / videogame stuff / whatever else, transferring as much furniture as possible to the balcony, continuing to clean on a regular basis, and leaving it that way until we move. Such thoughts will have to come another day though, as we're getting to the time now where I should wake Jen up (she has stuff to do today too), and get on with the day. Maybe by the next time I write, I'll be able to say bugs have been taken care of. That would be... wonderful...
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Date: Sunday, June 22nd, 2014 - 2:56pm
Subject: It Doesn't Take Much...
Security: Public
Guess what? I've been called in to work early again. Was supposed to just work 8 - close, but stumbled out to find a message from Manoah saying "somebody" had called in sick. Called back, talked to Gabby... that's done and taken care of, and in all likelihood, Jen still won't be back before I leave.

I really do feel bad for the way the next few days are going to end up for her. Today, she had to get up early to go to a birthday party at her mom's. I was invited, but declined, largely on the grounds that I worked until 4am yesterday, plus a couple more reasons to be explained in a bit. Tomorrow (Monday), there's a rescheduled-from-last-Monday fire alarm test at 9am. Said test requires access to all units, and as she's still sleeping in the living room, and would rather not be woken up, she's probably going to stay up all night. Finally, on Tuesday, she has to take Conner to have another x-ray done at ~9am. Yep. He seems back to his usual self now, so presumably whatever happened has healed on its own, but I suppose they'll find out for certain that morning. I, on the other hand, have nothing different from normal coming up. An extra few hours at work today, yes, but that's normal, then I work 5 - close again tomorrow (unfortunately with Manoah - bleh), and on Tuesday, I'll just be back to Heart and Stroke for ~2, and then at the house for a little bit after that, because Adam and Trish want to borrow a Wii, and they've decided the router there needs to be replaced, and would like my assistance in finding a new one. Here's a secret: the only knowledge I have of what to look for is "something similar to the one they have already". We'll figure it out.

Now then, I said I'd come back to more things about the party at Jen's mom's today, yes? I'm still kind of conflicted, because I too could most likely have just dealt with being awake from 10am, and I have been told several times since then that it's alright that I don't / didn't want to go, but still... For one, the birthday party proper wouldn't have started until at least 1pm. From what I understand, heading over there so early would've been done because that's the absolute latest Linda could have left to pick Jen / the two of us up. Must have something to do with cleaning or preparations or somesuch. For two, as I said above, Jen's likely to still be out by the time I leave for work, and that'll be at 4. Five hours is a considerable stretch of time, but at least for me, I suppose I could've kept myself occupied in the event of boredom. Through our two consecutive date nights last week, I've acquired two new 3DS games - New Super Mario Bros. 2, and Kirby: Triple Deluxe - as well as a couple more crossword books, in addition to the several I have already. Simply put, I would've had things to keep me busy. There is still a third and final reason that was part of my decision not to go, though. For a while now, I've been told every so often about this "Mark". I want to say he has some sort of developmental disability, and therefore is extremely chatty. While I don't care one way or the other about that, I do care when I'm told multiple times that I'm sure to be the exclusive topic / target of his questioning. I suppose I can't avoid it forever, and I don't feel that I'm actually trying to, but... some other time, please? I'm not a particularly talkative person as is.

So that's pretty much what's going on today. Orlando and I are closing again, and hopefully we'll have a less busy night than yesterday (from ~11pm to ~3am, we had about ten minutes total where there were no customers in the drive through at all), and it will be nice to have time to actually do things at home. I need to clean the fan that's out here in the living room. Unscrew the covers, rinse those in the shower, then wipe the blades with a damp cloth... We also need to take some time on Tuesday or Wednesday to properly steam clean the mattress and crevices in the bedroom. I'm still managing with my routine of falling asleep on the floor in the living room, and relocating to the bedroom whenever I wake up again, but the sheet that's covering the mattress is starting to get quite a few noticeable spots on it, and I'm starting to notice a bug or two here and there even when it's just daylight out. We have a working steam cleaner, and a mattress cover to go with it. All we need now is to have some time where we're both not doing anything, to just go in there and get that work done and over with. I feel like if I were still living at home (minus the bugs), this is right about the time of year I'd reorganize my bedroom. I could in theory do that just as well here and now, especially if our portable air conditioner is to be hooked up, but then the bed won't be in front of the window, and... I haven't decided yet.

I suppose I'm going to go back to other things now though. Play Kirby some more, continue watching videos on Youtube (my newest thing is videos of lockpicking - bosnianbill in particular), perhaps give Butters a scoop early, and then be off to work. An hour should be just long enough~
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Date: Monday, June 16th, 2014 - 4:27pm
Subject: Just Another Random Entry
Security: Public
...3:10 in the afternoon
...I'm bored with watching random videos on YouTube
...this same thought keeps going through my head, and even though it's wrong, I always think it's right at first

Jen just got up, and was awake for only a few minutes before she laid down again. From what I understand, though, she was up until at least 9am waiting for people to come check the smoke detector in the entryway, only for the entire building-wide inspection to be rescheduled. Next time is only a week later, and same as today, I'm likely to just sleep through it, but for her sake, they had better come. Other than that bit of annoyance though, I keep finding myself thinking that today is the start of a weekend. Yesterday was our one year anniversary, so I asked to have it off from work, and I'm evidently used to returning to work on Thursday after having a day off, but it's only Monday, we're closed at midnight, and if anything, Tuesday is going to throw me off more. I asked for the 15th - Sunday - off so we could do our own things, as well as the 19th - Thursday - presuming that with normally having Tuesdays and Wednesdays off now, I'd just have the full three days. Mary, however, decided to take it a different direction, and was actually nice enough to give me shifts on those days I'd normally have off, so I could make up some of my hours. I asked her about it last Thursday, after noticing that she'd also scheduled me in to work 8 - close on the 25th, and I now have that one off, but still work this coming one. Whatever. I still get to work with Orlando, and being done at 11 should be a nice change. And after all that, what are our plans that made me want to have three days in a row off? Nothing too different from last year. Go to Dollarama, Walmart, and wherever else to do some shopping, see How to Train Your Dragon 2, then head to Boston Pizza for supper. Honestly, I would prefer it if we weren't on a time limit for shopping (Jen will be busy 'til ~5pm, and the movie starts at 7:40, so we'll probably want to be there around 7:20), and could go to supper before the movie, so we don't just fill up on popcorn / snacks, but... I do have both Wednesday and Thursday off. Maybe things could be spread out over both days. Shopping and movie on one, then supper and whatever else on the other? I almost want to wake Jen up right now to ask what she thinks...

For something less related now, yesterday was also Father's Day. I still regret that it happened, but we both ended up sleeping until almost 5pm, which threw a wrench into my wanting to walk over to the house to wish Dad a happy Father's Day, and just visit with everybody there for a bit. Wouldn't have worked anyway, considering they were gone out to Kelsey's then, but I still got ahold of him later at night, and he seemed to appreciate the call. I heard Adam shouting to me while I was on the phone that Trish and Ericka will definitely be here by the 18th, so it would be really nice to stop by and say hi to them, and Dad also mentioned how once they're here, we'll *all* be going out to some undisclosed place in the city. And not Lucky Inn either. If I had to guess, probably Boston Pizza, but I suppose we'll see. I'm sure Jen wouldn't mind going twice in the same month. Now, something different (more related to the day itself) is what a customer at work on Saturday told Orlando and I. Apparently he also lives just across the street from this building and sees me walking to work almost every day, but that's unrelated. He jokingly harrassed Orlando about needing to pick up the pace on line, then I gave him his food, and just before he left, he said "...and guys... if you are fathers, or have fathers somewhere, Happy Father's day". At the time, it was ~2:30 in the morning, and it caught me by surprise, so I just told him "You too!", but thinking back on it now, I really like the way that happened. If we have fathers somewhere, sure... "If you are fathers", though... I remember back when we were starting to get more serious that Jen was telling me about how friends of hers and other people she would talk to would ask about how I was with Conner, and how Audra was the only one who seemed to understand her "no pressure" stance. Even now, it's more just "If you want to do this in regards to him, you can, but I don't want to you feel like you *have* to do anything", and... yeah. To this date, I have never changed him, and can see that happening probably in the future somewhere, but not anytime soon. I will happily hold his hands away or pin down both his legs and arms when Jen requires assistance - it's a satisfying sort of payback for his occasional bouts of world-ending screaming, but apart from that, I just... don't know. What do I do with him that could make the phrase "Happy Father's Day" apply to me? Nothing that comes to mind, yet when Jen said "Oh, and by the way, Happy Father's Day" to me yesterday, I thought for an instant that I would feel uncomfortable and awkward, yet what I actually felt was a warmth / okay-ness. Mind you, at the same time I write this, I feel like I'm saying far too much about it, so I don't know.

...I should probably read this email from Michele now. When I was there last Thursday, I told her about how plans to come in on the 17th, 18th, and / or 19th were uncertain, because of what else might be going on, and she asked me to just email her. Friday morning, when I wanted to listen to music without waking Jen up, I noticed that my earphones weren't in my pocket. I care more about losing the PSP remote, because that's something I'd have to buy a replacement for online, but after checking at work, and in my pockets several more times, I included that in my message to her, and just for that fact, want a little more to not read her reply. I know I must though so... "Don't worry about coming in this week" she says (I told her I could help out for a few hours on Tuesday if she wanted), and yes, I left my earphones on the edge of the bathroom sink. Well done, self. At least they're not actually lost. As for work there as well, it's going pretty decently. I started off this time making all manner of stupid mistakes - using the wrong deposit date, not putting the school name (for school funded events) in the clearly-marked field, and receipting *all* amounts instead of just those over $15 - but now that I actually know what I'm doing again, it's been going better. Actual work has been going pretty well too. Amusingly, even though I've been switched over for several weeks now, I've yet to have one full pay period where I work a proper five closes followed by two days off, but maybe that'll happen after these days off I have coming right now. Tom's been getting on my nerves lately, which is nothing I can't deal with, but next Monday, I have the pleasure of working 5 - close with Manoah. My opinion of working with him has been up and down over the years, and maybe it'll still come back up, but any time I see him lately, he's just there to get a minimum of work done, and spend the rest of the time distracting other staff from what they should be doing. It doesn't seem like an entirely fair statement for the closers to say the day people have it easier than we do, but apart from simple sales and busyness, how is that not true? There *are* a few people - Bonnie, for instance - who do have a proper work ethic, but put one of these other people on a close and tell them "Know that stuff you usually leave for the next person? That has to be done before you can leave tonight", then watch the look on their face. Or maybe I'm getting old and bitter. I have been there for 8 or 9 years now... Different shifts equal different experiences, I suppose. The one main thing I have been enjoying lately is working with Orlando. For the most part, actually working with him isn't different than working with any other manager, but he's almost always closing, as am I, and it's nice to have somebody to walk home and talk with at the end of the night. Alot of the time we just end up grumbling about work, but really, pretty much anything goes. Would you believe Jen and Michelle (his girlfriend) have the same middle names? I actually learned that while we were at work, but just being able to talk about whatever is really nice.

Anyway, it's going to be 5:00 pretty soon (I'll be leaving for work at 6), and I'm going on ~1,600 words, so this should probably be it. I know I haven't written about everything I wanted to, but as I said last time, the main things are covered, and that's what matters. Hopefully this doesn't take too long for Jen to read~
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Date: Saturday, May 24th, 2014 - 3:20pm
Subject: It's a Special Weekend
Security: Public
I know Jen wouldn't be much a fan of this, but I rather like it. When I woke up and came out to the living room today, it was kind of chilly, because both the air conditioner and fan were on. Turned both of them off, opened the balcony door, sat down to eat some cereal, and now, about fifteen minutes later, am hearing on and off music and other talking from the park down the street. Indeed, Retrofest is this weekend, and is being held primarily along King St, most undoubtedly with some events in the park as well, which I find pretty cool. It was still close by enough that I'd run into it on my way to work back when I lived at the house, but to be on the same street as it, and close enough by that sounds drift up even when I'm sitting here just doing normal before work things is quite neat. Of course, it raises the question of how I'm going to *get* to work - I can't see them closing off King St to pedestrians as well, but I won't know until then - but for just sitting here, I like it.

Speaking of work as well, there's been some changes. Or will be some changes. For me, mostly, but one directly affects me, and the other only affects me as a closer. Toward the latter, we're open 'til 4am Friday and Saturday again. Joy. Yesterday was our first night for that, and there were only two customers after three, but that's going to be fun in the weeks to come. Last night, I closed with Mary, and she was out enough of it anyway, having woken up at ~7:30am to get a plumber in to find out why we keep having an overflow near the inside pop machine, but I had all the energy in the world, and that was without drinking the energy drink I'd brought in. I was also working 5 - close, because I offered to cover Cheryl's shift after she gave Mary a doctor's note excusing her from work until September (seriously), and it went quite well overall. Quite busy between 10 and midnight, but back to slow enough to get caught up after that, and be out in ~20 minutes. Tonight, however, Orlando is closing. That could well be fine just on its own, but Retrofest is still going today, so it'll almost certainly be busy again, and it really wasn't busy past midnight yesterday, so everybody could be waiting to come in tonight, and we're still open 'til 4am, and... yeah. It's fine, I suppose. Mary definitely doesn't want it to be a permanent thing, so we can probably expect to go back to closing at 3 again eventually, and until then, it's just an extra hour. No big deal.

Item number two comes as a result of Tom, but I'm trying my absolute hardest to not let it seem like the change has gone through directly because of him. For Summer, he wants to play tennis on Thursdays. Mind you, as both Orlando and Mary have said, he could either suck it up and close that night anyway, or just be done with tennis in time to come to work for 8, but I'm still due for a change, and that's what's happened. Effective as of the schedule starting on June 4th, I'll be closing Thursday through to Monday, and then have Tuesday and Wednesday off. Will be nicer once I start getting caught up on things at Heart and Stroke again, but apart from that, it's something different, which I'm sure will be fine once I get used to it. Next week, though... Dad's retirement is sometime next week. It's also his birthday, and to celebrate, we're having an extended family get together here (well, at the house) on Saturday. I asked for that day off a while back, so Tom's closing that night, but for ease of making the schedule or to ensure I still got roughly the same number of hours or something else that currently escapes me, from tonight, I have next Tuesday off, and from there, work through until Saturday. Yay again. Maybe it'll be worth it having a weekend night completely off.

In other news, Thunderbird is being mildly stupid. All the feeds I checked between getting home and going to bed last night are no longer updating on their own, and still refuse to do so when I go back into their properties and tick the "Always check for new items when getting messages for this account". Secondly, I could make a correction to my previous entry. It was not Manoah, but rather Orlando who commented that somebody seemed to be living outside of their means when I told him about Linda owing me money. I don't feel that he meant it in an accusatory way, however, and indeed, he couldn't say very much after yesterday. Last week, I lent him $40 for something or other that I can't remember now, and we agreed that he'd pay me back on either the following Friday or Saturday, since that's when we'd see each other next. When I got to work yesterday, he came back almost right away, saying that if I actually needed it right then, he had the money for me, but otherwise, was wondering if it was alright if he gave it to me next week. Apparently Michelle didn't get money she was expecting or something. I know I have money to get by until then, so I told him that was fine, and went off about my things as usual, but there was that. I was thinking about it on the way home last night, and came up with something I think sounds pretty fair. I recently redid my list of money owed, to be more descriptive, and to be more precise about dates. Next time somebody borrows money from me, I'll also be noting the date they borrowed it on, in case that ever becomes relevant, but until then, it'll be alot easier to keep track of what I'm currently owed. Anyway, my idea is thus. When somebody borrows a reasonably small amount of money from me, I'll ask when I can expect to be paid back, and make a note of that date in my file. Ideally, come that day, they'll come to me, either with the money, or with an explanation of why they can't pay me back then, sort of like Orlando yesterday, and I'll make a note of that date, then ask the same question: when do they expect to pay me back. Then, if they don't have anything for me on the second date, late fees will start to apply (I've yet to figure out exactly how those will work though), until I get some money from them. I'm figuring if it's a large amount, I'll accept any payment more than $20 (but if they're abusing that to just pay me $20 every time, like Tom was before, I might have to say something), and if it's just a small amount, I'll expect the entire thing to be repaid.

Also, in order to make for less stress for me... The thing about lending money lately is how it leaves me with not very much for myself. I always try to take it out of my checking account, because that's responsible, but my checking account is mainly where I'm trying to save money, not to mention where money for whatever I want / need comes from. Therefore, until I'm better off, I'd like to take any money that people need to borrow from my savings account. That incurs a $5 charge each time money is withdrawn / transfered, however, so my figuring is to give them two options. Either they'll pay me that $5 back in addition to whatever they borrowed, or pay 10% of their requested amount on top of that. Mind you, thinking about how that would go now quite fills me with uncertainty, but that's what I've figured so far. Also, *all* the money I'm currently owed, whether it came from my checking or savings account, will be going into my savings account as I get it back. That's part 2 of the above, with the idea being that my checking account will be for *my* money, as that would hopefully be easier to manage.

I should probably go get Jen up now though. Her Mom called a little bit ago, wondering how Conner was doing today (he twisted his ankle or something yesterday, and doesn't want to put any weight on it), and I know she wanted to go out to No Frills to get the stuff to make apparently amazing sandwiches, so... yeah. There's some random updates, and now it's time to get on with the rest of the day~
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Date: Tuesday, May 13th, 2014 - 1:55pm
Subject: Ten Years of Entries...
Security: Public
So I'm sitting here just working on backups, because that's what I've chosen to do with my day today, and I've started with uploading certain things to MediaFire, since that's an easy part to forget. Very first item? LiveJournal entries. Apparently I haven't done a proper backup of those since December of 2013, and in making the folder for 2014, I noticed I've had an account here for ten years now. That's a long time... Back when I registered here, it was so I could have an offsite location to whinge (write) about problems that being a member of Dragon-Realms was causing me, as well as about other things that were going on in my life. After that came literal years of insecurity-based problems, but that's not to say there weren't just as many high points, and now I hardly ever write at all anymore, because I can most always talk to Jen if something is on my mind. Ten years though. That's something...

As for other things today, I'll obviously be back to being busy quite shortly, combined with some annoyance on the side. A little while ago, I discovered there was a Storenvy page for Lapfox Trax, with several CDs that I would've liked to have, if possible. To date, I have one, which is probably still in stock even now, but the others may be a lost cause, and that really annoys me. The cassette tape was "Coming Soon" for the better part of a week, but when I woke up, came out here, and refreshed the page this morning, it was - surprise surprise - out of stock. Collector's / Limited edition things like that will sell quickly, sure, but for Roy's sake, why have an actual sales website if you can just contact interested buyers directly, and save people like me who are never actually going to have the chance the worry? I know, I should stop whining and start keeping an eye on his Twitter page if it really matters that much, but that doesn't diminish the irritation any. Also, about a week and a half ago, looking back now, Jen linked me to a certain user's entry on here about a free icon day. I hesitated for a while, because I couldn't think of anything to ask for, then decided to just go ahead with a vague idea anyway, and sent the person a $10 tip, to boot. Now, I realize I am by no means the highest tipper, nor am I the only one, but are you kidding me, or can you legitimately not make even one icon (for the first person who commented, even) in the ten days time since the ad went up? Whatever, I guess. I've spent more money on paid commissions in the past, that I'll still never see completed, so $10 more to that isn't much. Plus, I need to try and remember that I still want to save money... My pay last week, after working 10 hours on Good Friday, was nearly $800. Quite nice, yes, and by no means have I gone through it all already, but I'm spending more than I should. There is one website I'm considering asking Jen to order some things for me from, because they only accept phone orders, and are based out of the States, so I'm not sure what sort of long distance charges that would incur, and otherwise? McDonalds for supper tonight might be nice, but only if I get through all my backups, as I suggested to her last night, and I should be able to manage otherwise. Money is the one thing though...

To put it exactly the same way I put it to Jen last night, the way I was figuring things back on Friday, by this time, I'd have $620 in repaid loans. What I did get back, however, was a whopping $20 (amusingly, Tom, who always had some reason to delay by a day or two before, was the only one to pay me back on time), and that went directly to Manoah, because oh, he already owed me $60, but wanted to borrow another $40, so I ran across to the bank for another $20 bill, and gave him that plus the one Tom had given me. He *was* supposed to pay me back in full yesterday (that $100 plus the $1,330 he owed me from the last substantial loan I gave him), but apparently he just can't make it three days. So long as there's $100 for me in the safe come Friday, or he has it in his wallet for me when I go in to work, then we're good, but if not, I don't know what I'll do yet. It's just... I don't like telling people no, because in every single case in all the years I've been lending money thus far, *I* have been able to get by, and that's what matters. When I learn that the reason Manoah (in this case) doesn't have as much money as he needs is because he went out and bought a $700 phone (one time before...), though, I feel like saying no, if only for the hope of having to force him to get by with less. I was telling him about lending Jen's mom money one of the times we worked together before last night, and before I had the chance to tell him it was for actual, real necessities (a new vehicle, paying off neverending loans, and such), he made a comment to the effect of "It sounds like somebody's living outside of their means". Yeah, Manoah. That would be you. I'm glad for him that he was able to get a bank loan to cover all of his other debts, but I just hope that works out for him. I'll certainly be more wary about lending him money from now on.

Anyway, it's already ten to 2, so I should probably go nudge Jen awake. Then have to make a backup of entries for May again, since this one will have been posted. I can live with that~
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Date: Wednesday, April 23rd, 2014 - 12:47pm
Subject: Getting Things Out Now
Security: Public
I wonder if it's at all possible to avoid having a repeat of last night. It's just about 12:20 now, and I was intending to get up and wash dishes to start off being productive at 12:30, but then I thought that oh, maybe it would be nice to write first, so things aren't on my mind for the rest of the day.

Yesterday afternoon, we went out to do a bit of running around. Linda wanted to borrow money, Jen and I wanted something for supper, she and her mom wanted tomatoes (apparently bacon and tomato sandwiches are just to die for - so much that she had an incredible craving for one at ~4am a couple days ago...), and, somewhat more by surprise, Evo was coming over. We'd planned to call him later at night, but it wasn't until going out was decided that Jen thought she could call him then, and we'd just pick him up along the way, which worked out well. After collecting him, we went off to the bank. The one up on St. Clair, which was fine, because to my mind, all of our destinations - there, Subway, and Food Basics - were all in one area. Linda wanted to go to Frick's for fish, too, but that was fine, because she was the one driving. I go into the bank, and transfer an extra $20 from savings just to be on the safe side, and as I'm putting my PSP away / taking the money from the ATM and putting it in my wallet, this random guy comes in and says hi. I said hi back, and turned toward the ATM, hoping he would realize I was busy. Maybe, maybe not, because he continued on, "You know, it's so rare to see another furry around Chatham. I just wanted to say hi." I don't know what his expression was at the time, but I tried to smile, gave a pitful "...yeah..." in response, said "Well, hello, then", or somesuch, and then we shook hands, and I told him it was nice to meet him. Fine interaction and all, but just... I don't know. Maybe I wasn't in the best mood for that then.

Things afterward were fine, and I ended up getting myself both fish and a couple sandwiches, which is mainly why I haven't yet eaten anything today (and intend to continue going without until after work, hopefully), then we all just sat and did random things. Evo packed up and left around 11, and Jen decided that would be a good time to take the laundry down, so she did that, and my night slowly fell apart from there. I had a good, solid idea of what I wanted to do, for whatever that's worth. I would make use of the living room to be doing some weirdo things I've been wanting to for a while, possibly actually starting with the dishes first, and then use the momentum from having cleaning up to do after that to go right through to tidying up the bedroom. What ended up actually happening though? I laid down on the floor at some point to have peroxide and rubbing alcohol in my ears, in hopes of removing whatever blockage I can occasionally hear while I'm chewing, and then I just never got up. I wasn't tired at first or anything, but I did eventually fall asleep, and when Jen shook me awake to ask why I was still just laying there, I said it was because I was lacking the motivation to do anything else. Why, though? The best answer I can come up with is that I wanted her to help me with things in the living room in some form, but she just continued reading things on her computer, and I never could bring myself around to doing things on my own. Furthering that theory is how when she first went downstairs with the laundry, I was up and ready to clean and was starting to work up a list in my head, but then she returned and went back to reading, and I must've been in too strong a mood to do something together.

Presumably a while after that, I felt her shaking me awake, and opened my eyes slightly to notice all the lights were off. She asked if I wanted to go to proper bed, and I said yes, so I stumbled off, trying for everything to not look at the clocks. I fell asleep pretty quickly, finally waking up again at ~11:40, and I think the rest has pretty much been said. I want to start the dishes or whatever before she wakes up, and hopefully that can keep me going until other things are done, or I have to leave for work. Whichever comes first.

Apart from that, I had one dream last night to write about. I was in Toronto, visiting Dan. It was the day I just got there, and I was walking back and forth from the kitchen to the living room, when it occured to me that I'd only brought my backpack, meaning no rolling bag with baking supplies and such. Thoughts started going through my head of what that meant for the furmeet, but they were shortly replaced by thinking of what else I / we could do with the time. Nothing solid ever came from that, but the way the dream went just felt weird. When I was asleep, it was as if I was *there*. I did wake up briefly a couple times between, and the last time I woke up before the dream ended, it was as if the dream was entirely real. I had to specifically remember that I was laying in bed next to Jen, which was kind of disorienting for a few moments. That aside though, it was just kind of cold, because the window was open, and the fan was on the second speed, and the balcony door out in the living room was slightly open, but instead of forcing myself up to close those / turn the fan down, I just grabbed a second blanket. And it worked. Maybe it being cold is why Conner was legitimately crying when I woke up, though...

I suppose that's all I have to write for now, at any rate. Things I wanted to say have been said, I know exactly what I want to do next. Dishes, and then Evo's supposed to be over again today, and we're all going to be having supper cooked here. At least the kitchen will be clean~
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Date: Thursday, April 17th, 2014 - 11:35am
Subject: Another Dream-Based Entry
Security: Public
It's about 20 after 10 in the morning here, and by all means I should've just gone back to sleep after I finished up in the bathroom a few minutes ago, but I have to write about a dream I just woke up from, because it was... messed up. I guess I'm starting to get over it now, but it had me feeling somewhat disturbed for a few minutes even after I got up, which is indeed something.

In any case, the beginning of the dream slipped by in much the same fashion almost all of the rest of them that I remember do. There was no discernible lead-in, which is bothersome because I don't just want to jump right to the main bit. As that's all there is to do though, let me describe the outside of my parents' house. The front yard is mostly bare, after the tree in it was cut down several years ago. A new one is slowly growing in its place, but the familiar shade that I knew from it throughout my childhood is surely lost for the rest of my lifetime. Somewhat in front of that is the porch, with a lattice design in front, a brick wall, and several adornments such as a bench, stool, cactus (at least at some point), and a mailbox scattered about. To the left, you can see the driveway. Gravel - I've wondered infrequently throughout the years what it would be like to have a paved lane, but that must be expensive, and if you look back far enough, the garage. To the right, finally, one can only see back so far. It used to be that there was a small row of bushes separating the front yard from the back, which one could easily walk around, but when they rebuilt the Wellington Centre sometime ago, a proper fence was put up, and that path was completely blocked off. In front of the fence, one can find the air conditioner, and if the window is open, a fun way to mess with the cats. In back, there's an entrance into the crawlspace underneath the back porch, and little else apart from a most likely worn-away wooden cross where Cloudy (an old pet rabbit) was buried when she died, and more fence separating the apartment's "yard" next door from ours. Back when we were kids, you could just climb through the fence, and have a root through their dumpster, which was needless to say stupidly entertaining (I mean that!) back then, and occasionally you'd ind something mildly interesting. Enough build-up and description? I hope so.

The dream itself now concerned the right side of the house. Behind that fence (that is, the bit separating the front yard from the back), a secret was discovered. I don't know how, but a hole roughly similar in shape to a manhole was discovered in the ground, and the contents were quite disturbing. People. Not just nondescript dead people all tossed into a hole in the ground (although I suppose that would've been unsettling in and of itself), but something kind of like capsules. There was obviously some power source present, because each capsule was lit with a small light and a soft blue glow from some unseen source, and it was disturbing. For whatever reason, the only view I could get was from far up above, but even from there, I could see what looked like two capsules, one on the left, one on the right, and they went down farther than I could make out. Now, I don't know how that sounds or looks according to your own imagination, but in mine, it was incredibly creepy. Random hole in the ground of the yard in the house I grew up in filled with (hopefully) humans in suspended animation? What in the hell is that? Why does it exist? How long has it been there? I overheard at some point (a very brief part of the dream cut to me talking to Mom or Dad about it) that the authorities had determined it had been there for at least 30 years, adding another layer of unsettling-ness. You mean to tell me this... thing was there all throughout my childhood, and it wasn't until ~29 years later that anybody finally uncovered it? I don't know about you, but that's even worse, and was arguably the creepiest part of the dream. Just something about this completely unexpected discovery of unknown purpose and intent... Maybe fascinating in other circumstances, but there, it was definitely not. The best part though? Unless my imagination intentionally chose to just gloss over that detail, I don't remember anything being done about it. I talked to my parents, sure, and I'm still getting to what was said there, but I remember nothing about the police coming, nor an ambulance, nor *anything* really. For a discovery such as that, you'd expect some sort of public interest, but... I don't know. Maybe they were all stuck in the hole or something.

At any rate, what came from talking to my parents? Not much, sadly. That part of the dream consisted of us being at the Canada Trust out on St. Clair, and inexplicably driving further down the side street that you have to go down to get into the parking lot. I was trying to equate those people being in the capsules in the hole to torture. It made sense in my mind to think that it was, and I was trying to explain why we (or I, at least) found it so unnerving, by saying "Well, we're used to the idea of physical torture, but..." [what about psychological?], however, nothing ever came of that. Possibly of interest is how at that point in the dream, I was a small child, probably around grade-school age then. I don't get it, but I woke up pretty much right after that anyway, feeling thoroughly creeped out, and kind of resenting the fact that it was as early as it was, because I knew I would want to write, but also would've rather gone back to bed. Today is a day off for me again, and that's nice, because it's supposed to be really busy, but I can't just go back to sleep, because Jen has an appointment later, and I intend to help her with cleaning the living room up. Then her dad might be coming down to give Conner his Easter treats, and because she got money today, we may be going out after that. I myself have only about $30, so I'm not sure I'll go much of anywhere, but we'll see.

...and... that's lovely. I'm glad you're eating it, Butters, but...

She's a small cat, right? Pukes if she eats too much. Occasionally she pukes even when given a normal (for her) amount of food, and some of the time when she does, she'll just eat it again, because it looks like the reason she pukes is because she doesn't chew her food, so it's still all solid anyway. So she puked last night, but neither of us cleaned it up (yay for lazniess), and just now I see her pawing at it, licking it tentatively, and then eating a bit. Most of it is still there, but she's back to perching on the back of the couch, licking her paws. Cat...

I suppose I'll go find other things to do now though. I forgot how utterly stupid OmmWriter is with repeatedly task-switching, so I'm trying not to ALT-Tab out of it again, lest I lose my taskbar a second time. Then it's just a matter of waiting for half an hour to wake Jen up, and going from there. Maybe I can mess with Firefox some more. I decided to switch back to it, after determining that it was impossible to customize folder icons on the bookmark toolbar in Google Chrome, because I'm just fussy like that. I even finally set up a folder of daily bookmarks in Firefox too (so I don't have to type all the URLs in every time - [ddg visual styles 7] CTRL-T [lapfox.bandcamp.com] CTRL-T [lapfox.storenvy.com] CTRL-T [spiderwebsoftware.com] CTRL-T [starshipamazing.bandcamp.com]), so that's nice. But userChrome.css isn't, and as per usual, it's started already. Hopefully it'll be simpler this time though... Oh, and there's an ALT-Tab attempt. I suppose that should be enough for now~
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Date: Thursday, April 3rd, 2014 - 11:12am
Subject: The Path Just Ends...
Security: Public
It's about quarter to ten in the morning, and I really shouldn't be awake, because I have to be ready to be awake until at least 3am for work tomorrow, but I just had a really... interesting dream that I must write about.

So I'm at the Toronto Zoo, just walking around. I find my way to where there's a long, bendy, ascending wooden pathway rising up over trees and various animals' enclosures (tigers come to mind) down below. Not long before stepping onto that path, I notice that everything to my left is blue. Just sky blue, devoid of trees or animals or scenery or anything else of that sort. Unsettling as that was, I explained it to myself as being that that part of the zoo was under maintenance - they were just rebuilding it, and I had only never seen that before. Still, though, the feeling was decidedly uncomfortable. I didn't notice it at all in the dream, but it was as if to my right, things were as they should be, and to my left, the world just doesn't exist. Kind of fitting that I'm writing this in OmmWriter, and have my background set to the one that's lighter blue above some nondescript darker blue wave shape. I didn't notice that until just now either...

Anyway, I'm walking, looking down over the edges of the path to see if I can spot anything, when I see standing down on a little section of land that does exist *just* outside my point of view from the path, a couple of the zoo's staff. I shout to them "Hey, there's supposed to be a forest down there!", in largely an amused tone, but also with a slight tinge of apprehension, hoping that they'll be able to explain why just nothing whatsoever exists for as far as the eye can see over there. Their response? They didn't. Didn't look up, didn't give any indication that they heard me... Just stood there continuing to stare at whatever they were working on. I can't remember how that made me feel specifically, but I know I decided to just continue walking, and see what I might find. Continued normal world to my right, nonexistence (save for the color blue!) to my left, when suddenly I encountered an obstacle. Well, maybe it's not correct to say I encountered an obstacle when what I came across was the literal end of the path. The two sides (which were spread far enough apart to accommodate a full-sized vehicle previously) met at an abrupt point, and right at the tip of that point was either a telephone pole or a tree. If it was a pole, it started on level with the path, and went up from there, and if it was a tree, it grew through the path, and went up farther than I could tell. In both cases, I didn't care to look, because something at a great height + nothing else to focus on nearby = vertigo. Even then, the main point is I couldn't continue. The path just stopped. To make it worse, all I could see when I looked out from there was nothing. The land ended in a triangle similar to the path, so no matter where I looked, except to the right and behind me, I just saw the blue void.

I imagine I thought something like "Okay, that's not right", or "Creepy", but before I knew it, I was already headed back the other way. When the dream picked up again, I found myself at a crossroads. Everywhere I looked around me, there was land. I still knew from my prior experience that if I started to head back to where I was again, the world would again appear to fall away, and I was honestly quite relieved to be away from that. The problem I faced then was not knowing where to go. Directly behind me was the beginning of the wooden path I'd just come from. Directly ahead of me was forest. No disernible path through, and I didn't want to get lost if I could avoid it. To my right, I saw a footpath that roughly followed the wood path, except it went down along the ground, with a natural dip in the middle. Despite having had no indication prior (it was quite sunny in the dream before that), there was a reasonable covering of snow on the ground, and I could see footprints all along up and down that path. In spite of there being no direct indication of it though, I somehow knew it was a zoo staff-only path. Maybe because of seeing those couple people standing somewhere along it while I was up on the wooden walkway... I just didn't want to go down it if avoidable either though, so as to avoid trouble. That meant my only option was to the look to the left, where I found a proper footprints-in-snow-covered path weaving through trees. It still didn't seem entirely right to think that I should walk through it, but as the conclusion I eventually came to went, it was my only choice.

I'm walking along just normally, and after a bit, the path widens out. I took that as a good sign, assuming it must mean I was getting closer to the zoo's entrance, even though I still hadn't seen and couldn't see any signs or markings to help that thought along. What did, however, was seeing a person off to my right. They were jumping along kind of oddly, and once again, I, being so unassuming, jumped to the conclusion that they must work at the zoo. I was glad to have come to that conclusion when they noticed me (perhaps I should note that by that point, I was pretty much walking on all fours for some inexplicable reason), and began racing in my direction, brandishing a wooden spear. Said spear was thrust at my face when they got close enough to leap forward, but they stopped just an inch short, which I took as completely normal, and didn't faze me at all. Now, any reasonable person in that situation would ask this other person for directions / assistance. How to get out of the zoo, why there's literal nothingness as far as the eye can see some distance back from their current location, why they're jumping around threatening people with a wood spear, or perhaps the most bleeding obvious, what it is with a zoo that you've been in for a considerable amount of time to have seen no animals, but I took a different approach. Oh, indeed I did. My semi-conscious brain (that is, the one inside of the me that was laying in bed asleep in real life) decided the best, most reasonable angle would be to consult and offer them suggested improvements on their acting performance. I've seen or heard this done in real life - I know it - but as I can't remember where, my general process was to ask them how they felt about how they were acting, and what they would change if their performance was up to them (within reasonable limits). At first, this person seemed unwilling to consider the idea of change. They told me they were happy acting the way their employer wanted them to, but I asked again. Setting aside their employer's wishes, if their act was up to them, what would they do differently? He tilted his head up, scratched his chin, and thought for a moment, before coming up with a different answer. These words aren't exact, but "I suppose I'd try to be more like Shrek", he said, before mimimg a more playful approach to sneaking up on people. He seemed to understand the idea of trying something different, and I said nothing more to him, only thinking an encouraging "Good!", before continuing on my way. I walked for a little while longer, then started wondering if I'd see the snow leopards at some point. I should mention again that I had yet to actually see any animals. I knew I was in the zoo. That much was undisputable, but apart from some vaguely familiar surroundings, it could've been any other wilderness. As if on cue, however, when I thought about the big cats, a couple came racing by, not terribly close, but still just off to my side. They didn't stop, and indeed, why should they have, and I took it as just completely normal and expected. "Why should I get anything from them now?" I thought. It was no different than any time I've actually seen them at the zoo.

Past that, I don't remember much else. I woke up, somewhat surprised to find myself in bed, thought about the dream, wanted to write about it, realized I had to go to the bathroom first, and... here I am. I'm still pretty tired, so I think I might actually go back to bed. We're supposed to be going out to Giant Tiger and Dollarama later, then having Evo over for supper at some point after that, and as stated at the beginning of this, I do want to be up until at least 3am, and that's not going to happen under the current circumstances. But first, I want to send an email about an order for a few things I placed a week ago. It's for a site that Jen showed me initially, which I ordered from for the first time then. My first order went fine, but the second one has been "In Warehouse for Packing" for a week now. Yeah. Hopefully the administrative address proves more useful than the contact form on the website. That'll be all for now though. I've accomplished what I wanted, so hopefully I can just entirely pass out and wake up feeling completely rested. That'd be nice~
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Date: Monday, March 17th, 2014 - 1:30pm
Subject: It's Time to Write Again
Security: Public
I feel rather worked up just now. It's a few minutes after noon, and while I wouldn't normally be awake at this time, circumstances are different today. For one, Conner woke me up banging a toy around in his room. I took it from him, he objected (via crying / screaming), and I retaliated by putting some corn puffs in the empty Kleenex box Jen gave him, which seems to have him occupied. For two, we both laid down early (~2:30am) last night, partly for utter lack of anything better to do, and partly because Jen had an appointment in the morning, and wanted to get a decent amount of sleep.

Last week at this time, I was probably still in bed, feeling not overly great. I remember walking home from work on Sunday night, and having that stuffy nose / sore throat sort of feeling, and sure enough, come morning, it was all the worse. Jen was out running some errands with her mom, and I, after a minimal (compared to the usual) amount of deliberating, picked up the phone and called work to say I wouldn't be in. As you might see from there, I was sick, so Jen got sick, and while I'm feeling largely better now, she's not quite there yet. Part of me actually wonders if her being sick is anything similar to Manoah, in that smoking will make it take longer for them to get better, but either way, she's still sick today. That's the reason she cancelled her appointment, and as of this moment, she's still off in the bedroom, sleeping, and I'm out here in the living room... listening to Conner continue to bounce around excitedly, and make noises that I really wish he wouldn't because he's going to wake her up.

That's all well and good, but why am I worked up, you might ask? Just because of the way today is turning out. Not really having anything to do last night (I / we could've washed the dishes, but Conner was sleeping directly in front of the door to his room, and we didn't want to wake him up), my mind started wandering off to other certain things that could be done. We could even have done them together, barring Jen not feeling well, but even that can be worked around. She wanted to lay down early though, as noted above, and I did so with her, figuring that at best, I could wait until she'd fallen asleep and do whatever, and at worst, wait until she'd headed out for her appointment in the morning. Yeah, it's come up plenty of times in the past, and regardless of her mood, things usually happen, even if just for me, but I don't like it when that's all that happens.

In an unrelated direction, I'm also worked up due to lack of emails. All weekend I've been waiting for shipping confirmation of a few things. I decided sometime on Saturday that I wasn't seeing those because it was the weekend, and people didn't ship then, but even now that it's Monday, all I've gotten are a spam email, and some message from PlayStation Japan. Perhaps later? Yeah, perhaps, but it was frustrating to wake up and still not see anything. I'm also waiting for a reply to a commission-related email. The artist told me back on... the 13th that they'd added the details I requested, and would get back to me "asap". It's three days later, and I guess they're just really busy. It's kind of funny though. Back when the commission first started, the guy was all apologetic about a couple days' delay in replying, and I tried to tell him it was okay by explaining that I'm used to it with commissions. He said he hoped that he hadn't added to those experiences, and I assured him that he hadn't, and even though I do still feel that same way, it really makes me wonder if I'm not to blame in some way as well. He promised me a free picture for the delay some time ago, and it's just things like that. I really do appreciate it, but when the main commission remains to be completed, it's hard to emphasize something coming after.

I wonder what work tonight will be like? I work 5-close, and Orlando is the closing manager, so that's good, but I'm really not terribly excited for the shift itself, after the way the past several have gone. To go back as far as Wednesday night, it was quite slow then. I think because of the weather, but just when I walked in there, pretty much everything was done, and I was fine with that considering I still wasn't feeling very well. I had Thursday off, as I always do, and it began with some excitement when I woke up to find an email from Michele saying the kits hadn't come in, due to the snow. Then came the weekend though, and some rapid change in everything. It was busy. On Friday night, it took all the effort I could muster to get the dishes done to a point where, at the end of the night, we just had all the usual end-of-the-night dishes and other chores, instead of having some of it caught up already. It took us until about quarter to four to get out. On Saturday, I got a ride to work, because Linda had money for me. She wanted to drop me off at 7:15, but I asked for 7:00, so I'd be there early, in case it was still busy, and they wanted me to start early. Manoah was just coming outside when we pulled up, so I went over and talked to him, and could just see how tired he was in the look on his face. He laughed about something or another that one of us said, but apart from that, he was just ready to be done. He apologized for all the dishes at the back, explaining that they'd been busy all day, and I told him it was alright, picturing something not any more worse than Friday night, and said that I could probably just start early and get some of them done. When I walked in, I found considerably more than I'd imagined. And I still got them all done before 10:00, when Tom's shift (he was on drive through) ended. It took me being back there while they were however busy up front, but they got done, and because of that, and other efforts (even though Orlando told me I was working too hard, and to take a break), we were out at about 3:20. Yesterday night was probably the best of the three, but it didn't start out that way. Just... everything about the night, but once it started getting going, I noticed Jeremy was at the back getting alot of the dishes caught up, leaving the most annoying thing to be how customers came for the entire night in groups of three or four. I'm just getting tired, and I want / need a day off, but even that won't be quite what it sounds like.

To make up for not going to Heart and Stroke at all last week, I told Michele I could help out from 2-8pm on both Tuesday and Thursday this week. It'll be fine, I'm sure, and at least for Tuesday, I have something in mind to do afterward to make it special, but it's a bit daunting when I've only slept in one day this past week, and that was 'til 1:30pm. The more I think about it though, the more I realize it'll probably be nice to have work to do that doesn't involve rushing around and trying / hoping to get everything caught up by a certain time. There is rushing involved, yes, but the difference is that I don't expect to get all my work done in one day. If only actual work could have the same rollover idea...

There are a couple dreams from last night that I want to write about now, mostly because of the proper dream-within-a-dream feeling. I don't remember feeling like I dreamt the actual dreams, but I do remember dreaming that I'd woken up and was telling Jen about them, only to wake up again after that.

three in hereCollapse )

About the only other thing I can think of now is that I should take some time to myself to relax / eat something / shave before I leave for work. It's already 1:30, and I'm still writing this... I know I want to go to the bank before work to deposit the money Linda gave me, but I also want to call the house to ask if there's any mail for me, and if there is, run by there before work to pick it up. Oh, and it's St. Patrick's day today, meaning that if I want to go look for certain similarly-themed things, today is the last chance I have, and I should go there before work too. It's going to be a full day by the end, huh? I'm sure it'll be nice though~
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Date: Friday, March 7th, 2014 - 1:11am
Subject: Money, Heart and Stroke, and Wenches
Security: Public
I feel mildly stressed out over money-related things again. Funny to think that just a week ago at this time, I was completely fine. Had ~$900 in my checking account, with every intention to spend minimally until my next pay, but other expenses came along.

unspecific cut for lengthCollapse )

Is there anything to say about the rest of the night? Following Heart and Stroke, I got a ride down to Giant Tiger from Michele and her daughter, walked over to the house to collect internet money from Adam and Naomi, and then walked back home, which involved some being nonsensically annoyed with the wind. Every time I'd walk around from being some buildings, there'd be a gust in my face, and I wasn't very impressed.


Butters! Those chips were for Conner! Wench!


Seriously, Conner woke up not too long ago, and in hopes of delaying him starting crying and waking Jen up, I gave him some chips. He wasn't too interested, but they were down in the corner by his door. What do I hear just now but crunching. And not the "Conner's eating" sort of crunching. The same kind of crunching I heard when there was a mysterious sound earlier, and I went out to find Butters eating more of the same chips directly from the little container that was on the floor. I know there are more where they came from, but seriously, cat. I haven't given you a scoop yet because I'm still writing. And it's only 1:00. You can wait a bit longer, can't you?

...apparently that's about all of particular interest I have to say for right now, hmm? I should probably respond to a commission-related message on Jen's Furaffinity account while the computer isn't in use. Then find something else to do. At least coming out here has proven useful. It's a nice change of pace, and I really ought to do it more often~
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Date: Monday, February 24th, 2014 - 5:38am
Subject: Entry While Jen's Asleep~
Security: Public
...tired... Had pizza for supper (6 pieces?), plus 4 or 5 of Jen's wings... Bottle of Pepsi... Then I decided an hour or so later that chocolate milk sounded nice. One carton of that too. Why do I do this to myself? Oh, right, because I wanted to surprise her. That's still worth it. I called her from work tonight about five minutes before we closed, and it wasn't long before I said "I'm hungry" and she said "I'm hungry too". I teased her by suggesting how tasty pizza and wings from Pizza Tonite would be, and she agreed, largely because she's been up since 9~10am, and an easy supper was preferable, then it was midnight, and I had to go do closing-related things, but the idea was already in my head: call Pizza Tonite right before we (Gabby and I) left, ask for my order to be delayed about half an hour, and conveniently have it arrive not long after I got home. It worked, too. I had just enough time to run out the garbage / cardboard and check the mail, then tell her about a couple things from the beginning of the night tonight, and the phone rang. She was confused, and by the second ring I was concerned that she wasn't going to answer, so I hurriedly told her "Let him in!", and that was that. We ate, watched an episode of Hell's Kitchen, she did a couple things out at her computer, laid down, and now I'm the only one awake.

For the most part, I've been doing just one thing: messing with Thunderbird. I can't remember exactly the thought process that led to it, but earlier today I was yet again considering moving from Firefox (Palemoon, technically) to exclusively Google Chrome. Problem is Chrome doesn't (so far as I know) have an RSS reader that's similar to Firefox's Live Bookmarks. Looking into a proper standalone feed reader came to mind as an alternative, but I didn't want some online solution, so I went to Google. Some random program came up first, but a comment on that page suggested Thunderbird, and... here we are. I have both my main email (into which all my alternate addresses are linked) and RSS feeds set up in it, and... it's nice. Breaking the habit of compulsively switching to Firefox (sorry, Palemoon) and hitting CTRL+2 is going to take a bit of time, but it really is a nice overall solution. One thing I would still like is for there to be a version 24.3.0-compatible menu editor extension released, because I surely don't need all of the context menu items, but the program itself is set up how I want it. userChrome.css tweaks have even started already, too. Thus far only a simple .tabs-alltabs-button {display: none !important;}, but if that says only one thing, it's that there will be more. I even wonder if that shouldn't be #tabs-alltabs-button[...], because if you click the button, a little menu appears, but... I don't care to find out right now.

Are there other things to talk about? I could be sure there were when I started, but I haven't a clue what they are now. I could go to sleep, considering I work 7 - close tomorrow, but not yet. Why not talk about work even? It's been going a little better than pretty decently lately. Some nights still start out in a difficult way, but by the end, I'm usually feeling good about how things have turned out. Both Friday and Saturday this past weekend, I was left (at 10 on Friday, and 8 on Saturday) with a couple to several hours of dishes piled up at the back (thanks, supper staff! I know it's busy but you could at least try FRS...), but despite the unfavorable odds, I got them caught up in plenty of time both nights. Tonight (Sunday), it seemed like I'd still have a fair few ahead of me, but my brain is used to only starting at 8 or 5 (a significant 3 hours earlier) on Sunday - not 7 - and Jeremy ended up not being done 'til 8, so he did most of the dishes, and Cheryl, Gabby, and I ran around and got other things caught up. By ~9:30, we were all done and had a good hour with very few customers to walk around and not do a whole lot, but I was still productive. You see, I still start my nights out by collapsing all the cardboard and taking it out before I change into my uniform. That way I don't have to worry about being sidetracked onto something else, and I'm not just standing there either. Tonight, however, pop was running out. Diet Pepsi, and iced tea, and regular Pepsi, and root beer, and mountain dew... Jeremy and I brought all of them in from the shed, then he had customers, so I (still while in my non-work clothes) proceeded to change all of those pops, then took out the cardboard, and then still had enough time to grab a fork and fry box to have piece of the lemon-meringue pie Cheryl brought in. A pretty good night overall, and the rushed walk home to ensure I had time to do other things before pizza arrived was a nice end as well...

...that previous paragraph is pretty disjointed, huh? Maybe that's a sign I should go to sleep... I suppose I'll at least try, because I can't think of anything else to write, and can't see anything else to do... Well, there is one thing that requires getting up, but I can do that once I post this. Until next time~
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Date: Tuesday, February 11th, 2014 - 6:44am
Subject: ...that's certainly a first...
Security: Public
It's almost 6am here, and for lack of better things to do, but not being tired enough to sleep, I put on some music on my laptop (I have earphones plugged in), laid back, and just listened. A short time later, I had to go to the bathroom. Cue unplugging my laptop, carefully standing up, and taking the entire thing with me, music still playing. Yay. I really should try to lay down soon, but the tiredness just isn't quite there yet...

Earlier today (too early by our standards), we had that unit inspection that I wrote about previously. Got up at 8:30 to have time to get things ready, brought Conner out to the living room around 9, and then... sat for nearly three hours. Yeah. It was nice when they finally came, and in a way curiously interesting for watching Richard take a seemingly routine walk around a room, note things that needed fixing, then head on to the next. A joke was made about how people on the other floors must have been literally rushing through the apartments, because they seemingly made it through three or four in the time it took Richard and whoever his coworker was to look through ours, but after all that was said and done, they left to continue to the next unit, and we went back to doing things as normal. Well, I laid down in bed, but Jen decided to take advantage of having already been up all night to just stay up for the rest of the day (and night), and thus be up early the following day (Tuesday), which'll be helpful because she has an appointment. I, on the other hand, slept 'til 5, which is probably the reason I'm still awake now. While sleeping, I had an interesting (albeit distressing at the time) dream, which I remember as follows

i haven't used one of these in a while...Collapse )

At any rate, I woke up at 5 as stated, to a quiet apartment, as Jen had gone out shopping with her mom. She got back home pretty quickly though, and the rest of the afternoon before I left for work was me laying in bed watching Fringe and eating chocolate, and her being busy in the kitchen making taco salad dip. Then it was off to work, for a reasonably good night. I wasn't sure what to expect, after the last time Manoah and I closed together, but nothing of note happened tonight, and he in fact even revealed (in no way that made it seem secret) one of the reasons he might have been in a bad mood before. Counting what he owes me, he's currently in debt on the low end of five digits. Yep. As I told Jen, I'd be pretty miserable too. Him aside though, work itself wasn't terribly busy, and I was able to get done everything I wanted to. Including yet another tray of sour cream, which is probably becoming unnecessary. You see, for some reason, my focus changed a couple months ago from prioritizing extra cleaning, to putting prep first. On slow weekend nights, I'll bag all the twists that are in bus bins, and put those bags back in the bins so the openers have an easier time. I'll also prep sauces, or pull torts, or, obviously, do up a tray of sour cream. Yesterday, Patience did one at ~9pm, and I did another around 10:30. Trays of sour cream are, by our standards, good for 24 hours. When I left tonight, Manoah was still using the tray that should've gone off at 9pm. I'm not sure how many bottles were left, but that means at lunchtime tomorrow (if not a little later in the afternoon, depending on how busy they are), they'll more than likely be using sour cream that's past its use-by time for twelve hours. Now, it stands to reason that there's some grace time - just because the sticker says a bottle expires on a certain day doesn't mean it isn't good past then - but it makes me feel kind of wrong at the same time. Maybe I should excuse myself on the grounds that tonight, I asked Manoah if he wanted that tray done up, and he said yes. But that doesn't work, because I should be the one to look in the walk-in first, and let him know how many trays / bottles there are to still use. Work things. Yay.

Moving onto more general things, a song on the radio gave me the idea to listen to music on the way home. It's been way too long since I've done that, and I thought it would make for a nicer walk, since I'd be going on my own. Ever since Orlando came back as a manager, he and I have been walking home together when he closes, and I've come to enjoy that, because it's nice to just talk and relax after a night at work. Since that wasn't possible tonight though, I listened to music as just stated, and it was... interesting. The album I chose was Ever After by Marianas Trench, which may not stand out very much to anybody else, but is (or was) significant to Jen and I, because I first discovered / got into it back when things between us now were at their very beginnings. Because of things that happened back then, I couldn't listen to it for the longest time because of awkward and uncomfortable memories, but apparently something's changed now. Strangely though, when I first set out, the music brought to mind not memories of things past between Jen and I, but something in Toronto. Specifically, being on the bus to Mississauga / Square One with Dan, hoping eagerly that the store he said sold giant plush animals would still be in business. I've been thinking about things there rather frequently lately, actually. About how it would be fun to go back, but how I haven't talked to him in so long that it'd be chiefly selfish of me to send him a message just in hopes of arranging another visit, as well as things we did before (venturing through the tunnels downtown, for example), and things that I'd like to do again if I ever went back. I keep telling myself that if that ever happened, the only way I'd go is if Jen was able to come with me, but the idea of even approaching her Mom about taking Conner for two or three full days overrules that, and I'm right back to where I started. Maybe I could go on my own. It'd certainly be worth consideration if I were to ever find myself in that position again, but there's still no way of telling how that would go. Getting back to music though, it was really nice for a while, but eventually frustrating. I decided to take a slightly longer route home, so I could listen for that much longer, but as soon as I turned down onto another street, every twenty or so steps some button on my PSP would get nudged, and the music would start fast-forwarding. Even with the remote lock on. Maybe what I need to do is remove whatever plugin it is that turns the screen off when the power lock is turned on. That music is the same thing that I was listening to prior to the start of this entry though. I've yet to make it through the entire album (which is a shame, because I seem to recall "No Place Like Home" being really nice), but yeah... music. Fun.

What else can I do here now? It's surprisingly only 6:30, and Jen's still fast asleep (although she stirred a few minutes ago, and I got right in close and whispered "magma" (an inside joke), causing her to repeat it to herself amusedly several times), and I still feel reasonably awake, but I can't think of much that I can do. Possibly go get my box of things from out in the living room and put them back where they were before the inspection, or just lay here and tidy up my desktop (I have more room now that Jen's rolled over and said something about "taste this..."). I feel like there's at least one other thing I meant to write about, but I can't remember anything else right now. Oh well. For now, I'm off to see what the time between here and whenever I get tired enough to lay down brings. Quite possibly nothing. Or everything. Magma~
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Date: Tuesday, February 4th, 2014 - 5:53pm
Subject: Random Update for February
Security: Public
Let's see how far I get with this...

Jen's gone out. Has some errands to run, including shopping for a few groceries and going to TekSavvy. Normally I would've gone along and at least picked up a few things at Dollarama, but I'm currently trying to save money. In addition to Valentine's Day coming up, Conner has an appointment in London next Wednesday. Nothing directly related to me, yes, but the moment I heard about that (a month or however long ago it actually was), I got all excited for the prospect of going with them. Asked Mary for the day off, started thinking about where I could go... all that. As it is now right now though, I might be going. So long as I have the day off when that week's schedule is made up. If so, well, the possibilities are pretty much the same as when I went there myself before. Numerous Dollaramas, Dollar Tree, White Oaks Mall, and whatever other places may come to mind. Problem is I'd have only about an hour while they were at the hospital, and because it's somewhat... removed from the cluster of stores encompassing White Oaks Mall and Dollar Tree, my options will be limited. I guess I could just walk around too. That would be nice. Another benefit to going would be that if I'm able to come, we'd all be going out for supper (my presence is necessary because I'm the only one who has a little disposable income), and that would be a really nice end to the day, considering Jen's offhandedly mentioned a couple times that this will be Conner's last appointment up there. Doesn't stop me from going on my own in the future, yes, but it wouldn't be the same. Stepping back from that, if I do on the other hand get scheduled to work that day, Jen's mom said I should get my shift changed to 8-close (if it isn't already), because we could still do everything and be back in time. Something to look forward to? Yes, but I'm trying not to overthink it too much.

In terms of other things, I suppose the first that comes to mind is that we've both been really bored lately. Kind of a funny thing to mention, yes, but it's noticeable because of how often it happens. For today, I have something to do eventually (sort out boxes in the storage closet), but for the moment am writing this, and once finished will be returning to watching Bar Rescue and doing whatever on my laptop, but what if she wants to use the PS3 when she gets home? Obviously that's fine, and I could return to watching House on my laptop with earphones (I'm about a season ahead of her, so to go without would spoil some things), but the boredom is just bothersome in general. Going back a couple weeks, I made a point of having some task in mind for each day off, so I could do that an not just feel like I'd been sitting around for the better part of the day afterward, but such as it is now, there isn't a whole lot I can think of to do. There's a unit inspection coming up Monday (purportedly for the sake of finding anything that needs maintenance), so cleaning up for that needs to be done, and that's something I could easily think about for later. I should head over to the house as well, because I had an email from Naomi when I got home from work last night to say that she had internet money for me, and there may be a package to pick up too, but that seems a bit far. I work 5-close tomorrow, so maybe I should leave at ~3:30 and head by there first. Maybe. Speaking of which, work...

Things have actually been overall decent lately. The past weekend was for the most part mind-numbingly boring (for lack of customers), but the shifts themselves are going well, and there's nothing to really complain about. Nothing, that is, except for Manoah. Back on the Monday before last (the 27th), we were both working 5-close. Later on at night, a customer wanted a couple Mexican Pizzas, but there weren't enough pizza shells, so he (Manoah) asked me if I thought I should fry up a package, and those were his exact words. Also of note is how at the same time, he asked me to make a chili mix, which is easy, and I was in the process of doing when he noticed the lack of shells. I told him (in an entirely flat tone of voice - no form of "attitude") that if he would finish making the chili and give the order out when it was done, I'd just fry the entire package of shells, and be done with it. He said nothing, but did as requested / suggested. Then, another customer pulled up to the speaker, so I had no choice but to go down and answer it. Manoah was down in drive through too, giving the order that was ready out, and I noticed he hadn't grabbed the sauces I had set out for it. I told him (once again flatly, with maybe only the slightest edge of wanting to help) that the sauces were just there, but he either ignored me or didn't hear me. Then I noticed he hadn't grabbed the forks or knives either, and said about the same thing as before. He proceeded to start yelling (more just speaking quite firmly / slightly angrily, in fairness), saying that the forks / knives / sauces in the containers next to the till were there to be used, in reference to my taking all of those out of the boxes they come in, in order to save time not having to restock drive through at the end of the night. At some point I told him that I was just trying to save time / help him out, even, but he wasn't having any of it, saying that he wasn't crew, and I had no right to speak to him with that tone. We went back and forth for a bit, me trying to explain myself and him repeating what he'd already said, and I finally decided that the spat wouldn't end otherwise, and told him "I'm sorry for the misunderstanding". Did he say anything of the sort? No, and I wasn't about to waste my time and be yelled at again for asking what the problem was afterward, so I just stayed out of his way for the rest of the night. About the only other thing I said to him directly was "Is there anything else you want done?" after I'd swept but before I clocked out. Following that, I changed quickly, took out all the cardboard and garbage, and left without another word. He was in 'til 5 yesterday, and was his usual chipper self again, but at least for the time being, I don't trust him. What did I do wrong? Tell him to finish making the chili and give the order out, or not take sauces and cutlery from the plastic containers? The more I think about it, it's probably the former, but if he's not going to explain nor say anything about it after the night in question, I'm just going to be done with it. I've just done four closes with Gabby, and have another five with Orlando coming up. Those should be better.

At any rate, that's probably enough for now. I'm not sure how much longer Jen will be, and I'd like to be done this before she gets home. Maybe I'll even start on organizing boxes before she gets back. I have snacks to eat first though. I love you (that's directed to a specific "you"), and... that'll be all~
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