July 16th, 2015

Another Healthy Dose of Discouragement

My first, and currently only proper appointment at the hospital was today. After talking to this guy - Evan - about what brought me to seek their services, so he could gather more information, I was left alone, to fiddle with the lock on the door and count my money, before he came back and told me I could go directly across the hall. In that room was another person, who would be Dr. Ade-Condi (or something to that effect). We talked for a bit, and she asked me a couple questions, but overall, of the three people I've talked to to date, I've spent less and less time with each one. We barely even scratched the surface of the issues I'm having before she told me my best course of action would be to set up an appointment with Family Service Kent, and I still wonder if they saw the look on my face change from genuine interest and hope, to a forced smile, and obvious discontentment.

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For now, it's bedtime, and I really really really hope I can lay down without my back aching again. Yes, it hurts in such a way where, if I lay on my stomach, which is the position I sleep in, it hurts unbearably. Somewhat amusingly, I was using a vibrator I bought from Target before they closed to attempt to massage the soreness away, but it didn't work. Maybe, just maybe, if this does continue through to August, I can politely beg Jen for a back rub, and pay her back with the best one I can possibly give in return. It's not necessarily a pleasant thought, but... it is something to hope for~