Karadur Inacu  (karadur) wrote,
Karadur Inacu 

What a Weird Night / Morning

Never before have I been in a position where I was more than tired enough to go to sleep, but could not, for being sick (or something close to it) from the snack I had before going to bed, and also having too many thoughts running through my brain. I might have been able to nod off, but even if so, it wouldn't have been a good sleep, and while the feelings of pain and sickness have passed now, it was actually quite helpful writing about the things that were / are on my mind.

I don't particularly want to say what they are in this entry, because I already have in a friends-only one, but in a nutshell, I have, as of late, lost my sense of self (clichéd, yes, but at least it's short and concise that way). I'm still living my life pretty much the same as before, but I don't derive the same pleasure from doing the things I used to enjoy, and while that may sound like nothing more than being bored, it's not. Some of the things I'm thinking of are what I've seen in the past as making me, well, me. For all I know though this could just be something else that will pass eventually, but if not, I've found a series of questions on Wikipedia that are supposed to help you identify what problems you may be having and work towards a resolution, so I'll try those.

As for stuff in the "not in my head" category, I picked up that other set of sheets from Walmart yesterday afternoon, and had put them on my bed by that point. Sleeping with three comforters over top of you is something that would be nice in the dead of winter, but not when it's at least ten degrees out. Also, Mom had to pick up some groceries at Real Canadian Superstore as well, and while we were walking through the aisles I noticed a large stuffed tiger over in the non-food half of the store. I did, of course, look for snow leopards first, but the closest they had to those were normal leopards with white bellies. I do plan on buying one of them if they're still out there next time we go grocery shopping, but I did buy the tiger yesterday, and it's quite awesome <3 Not only is it actually, well, big (from head to tail I'm only slightly taller than it) and well made, but also, the tag attached to it said it was $35. Upon wheeling it out of the store in a cart, I had paid less than $20 ^^

Anyways, Manoah and I are closing tonight, with Orlando there 'till 12, then tomorrow and Tuesday, I'm effectively working his hours. I do plan on volunteering to close if they want me to, especially because I need more hours. It almost seems as if Sheila took my booking lots of days off earlier this month to mean I don't want to work as much, but that isn't the case. Perhaps now that things have settled down again my schedule will be more consistent. Tomorrow and Tuesday I work 8-12, as I just said, then have Wednesday and Thursday off, work Friday and Saturday but not Sunday (I think), then close on Monday and Tuesday as well. I have to leave in an hour and ten minutes though, and I think I've written all I wanted to for now as well, so I'm going to find something else to do until then~

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