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Specific Sources of Irritation

Dearest Visa people: why oh why do you do this? Is it normal to bill somebody for a card that hasn't been activated, much less detached from the sticky stuff holding it to the piece of paper? The first time I called was one year, three days ago, and after ending that call was certain I didn't have to worry about any more fuss with you guys. Sure enough, I didn't for almost a year, but then one month, one day ago, I received a new chip card. "Surely I don't need this", I thought. "They can't bill for what I don't acknowledge receipt of", but sure enough, I got just that in the mail today. A bill for $25, which I was, needless to say, displeased to see. Let me switch gears completely now and say that I like the difference between having one of your representatives call me, and phoning them. The lady who called me was persistent well past the point of being friendly, citing such reasons as that "Everybody needs a credit card!" and "What would you do in an emergency?" Let me put it this way: I don't believe... no, I see it as flat-out impossible to spend money I don't have. While I might tend to agree with you about everybody needing a credit card, you cannot, and by that I mean never ever will be able to say that everybody needs one, and even at that, who's to say they should get one of yours? Aside from recent problems with it, I'm quite happy with my Money Mart Visa, as I can use it for places that don't accept any of my other preferred methods of payment, and as for what I'd do in an emergency I'm honestly not quite sure, but on top of avoiding situations like that, I also have a fair sum of cash in case anything unexpected should come up when I go away.

Now, towards the differences when calling you folks instead, I've been met with little to no resistance the two times I've called to cancel thus far. I've needed only to provide my name, be informed that upon destroying the card everything would be taken care of, tell the person on the other end "Thanks for your help", and be done. Now on a slightly different note, I'm watching you, Money Mart. TekSavvy took their payment from my card this morning, which is still listed as an authorization which could explain why it doesn't yet have a fifty cent charge attached, leaving me with ~$13 on the card. That should, in theory, be more than enough to cover July's monthly fee, but I'm going to put an extra ten dollars on it this Thursday, or Friday if you should happen to be closed the day before. Why? Because with the track record between us over the past couple months, you're more likely to charge $15 and hope I don't notice, in which case I'll be doing a little more than just going into the store. Oh, and this is mildly unrelated, but why, when all it takes is a quick find & replace, does your terms and conditions page still reference Mastercard? I brought that to your attention over a week ago, but it still hasn't been changed.

Finally, something directed to my mind regarding dreams, which I'm going to put behind a cut since it's somewhat lengthy.

I went to bed at 1am this morning. My decision to do so came about because I was tired and bored, and ended up falling asleep only for eight minutes at first after laying down to think about those trades of money for art, but woke up after that still feeling as if I had nothing to do, and went back to sleep for the rest of the night afterward. During that time, oh, the dreams I had were depressing and sad, and at one point I had to sit up awake in bed for a couple minutes just to think about the things I was planning to do that day, to remind me that the things quickly escaping my memory were, in fact, only dreams.

The first one involved Adam and Josh. Yeah, Josh. I haven't seen him in about a month now, and that was only for ten minutes so why exactly did he appear in my dream? All three of us were at school, or in a school like setting, which I can remember noticing only for a fraction of a second. Seriously, I have to think rather intensely to even remember how that setting came into play now, but at any rate, we were all reading a flyer of some sorts detailing a competition, which the winner of would be whisked off for a day to some different school or building and learn what it's like to be a video game designer. Josh and Adam must have both taken great interest in that, because next thing all three of us were at home, with Josh sitting in front of the computer, working away at making a new level in Lunar Magic. It seemed the idea was to make a new level in your favorite game, but evidently they went the route of picking one of the easiest games to edit instead. They both finished in what seemed like a split second in the dream, and on their way back to school were teasing me about not having even started mine yet. Who said I was going to enter in the first place, guys? Unbeknownst to you, I still have the partial hack I made a long time ago with a whole area of levels edited, including part of the overworld. Thing is, only one was particularly good, and it still had its share of bugs, so I wasn't content to use even it to enter the contest.

At this point, I should note that the entire feel of the dream was it taking place back when I was still young and in school, but with my mindset and attitude of today. To give it some context in this case, my opinion towards the contest was "That doesn't interest me, so why should I?" But then there were also feelings of guilt and general displeasure at what would happen when I failed to make an entry, leaving me feeling stuck between, to use a cliche, a rock and a hard place. If I go one route it's going to be so I don't get them upset with me, and I can't abide that, but if I go the other they'll know exactly what I think, and I can't have that either. Thankfully, the first dream ended then, but there were still two more to follow.

The second started out in largely the same way as the first, except with a different setting, and that Dad was involved. He, along with Adam, Josh, and I were all outside planning to go on a short trip somewhere (of course I can't remember the destination), but I was opposed to going for reasons I don't recall, and was hoping that by being somewhat disagreeable I could get one of them to ask what was wrong, and have the things that were bothering me out that way. Instead of things going as I'd hoped though, Dad pointed his finger back towards home, and said "Then walk alone" rather dismissively, in a tone that said "Fine, I don't know why I bother asking you to come if you never want to", and off I went. Note that we were a fair distance away from home, out at what, when I woke up, felt like Bloomfield. That's a fair distance for me to walk even now, let alone as a kid, but off I went anyways, and remember seeing myself quite near the vacuum place out on Richmond, thinking about what Dad had said. I pictured him in my mind once more pointing away saying "Walk alone", and burst into tears. Kind of embarrassing because I was outside and everything, but I didn't have a chance to give it any more thought, because that dream ended right then, and the third started.

Manoah and I were out walking around some mall or store, when he took off on his own for a minute and came back excitedly telling me to follow him. I did as he asked, and eventually found myself standing in front of a pool, which he said was the kind he wanted to put in our back yard. He said it had been completely paid for and everything, but the problem is, it was an in-ground type. Fearing the worst, I took off on my own to find out how much the thing had cost, and eventually found a display with all that information, listing the price as $2,000. Not even kidding. Is that how much in-ground pools really are, or was it just my mind picking an exorbitantly high price? At any rate, I was immediately filled with guilt. After all, he hadn't yet spoken to Dad, so in essence, it was I who had given him permission to put a pool in our backyard, but not the specific type. It also bothered me somewhat, because he had specifically mentioned getting an inflatable pool, so why would he suddenly change his mind without asking and by something exponentially more expensive? Unfortunately, I didn't quite have the chance to ask him because that dream ended right then, but I am taking more than just a little comfort that, in real life, he's smarter than that.

As for all three dreams though, I just don't know. It's funny how I can remember them in such detail, when the one I had during my quick eight minute nap slipped away before I was fully awake, and towards the first two, I think I can sum up the feeling of uneasiness with this description. Know the saying that goes "follow your heart"? That's exactly what abates that feeling. Instead of forcing yourself to do something that feels wrong, doing whatever makes you feel good and right. I know it isn't always possible to follow that rule, but it is far more satisfying to than to not.

So now with that out of the way, I'm off to work to get my pay stub and extra money since I'm treating this pay as the first of the month. I have a feeling things are going to be just as tight this pay as last, but there's only one way to find out, and after that, well, I don't know, but I'll definitely not be giving up and going to bed early again tonight. Even if I have to turn my light on and sit in the middle of the floor, I will, because once, as with so many other things, was more than enough~

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