Then thinking further, the tail I sent back so long ago on the 14th is about in the same place. They should be getting it back any time now (I would've expected it to show up sometime this past week), but alas, I've received no messages yet. No messages from anybody at all last night, in fact, which is a bit of a letdown. I was thinking about it long and hard all night at work, and have come to the conclusion that I don't like where the end of my story is going right now. I come across as far too impatient, far too eager to get away from everybody. The idea is that it's supposed to be harder on me to make the decisions I do, and even have to take a while to think and talk through it myself (much as in real life, when I brought my camera along on long walks home and talked about things into it while recording my surroundings), but at the moment I'm portrayed as making this decision in seemingly less than ten minutes, and sticking to it without a second thought despite protestations and concerned questions from a friend that joins me for the final scene. No. That's far too rushed. Either this friend and I need to be portrayed as parting on good terms / only after we fully understand (but not necessarily agree with) the other's point of view, or it needs to be dealt with more slowly. This friend has come along with me, and we're talking things out, so let's actually talk things out in the story. There needs to be more dialogue. More of my thoughts and feelings about what both they and I are saying need to be written down. It's something that took time for me to "come to grips with" in real life, which thereby means it cannot be anything but the exact same thing in the story. And now that I've typed all of that out, perhaps I'll either copy and paste it in an email to the author, or give them a link to this entry and say "read the second paragraph". It'll save me having to explain it over again, and while I have technically asked for two disparate changes to the end now, a third shouldn't be pushing it when, as far as I know, they haven't quite made it to the rest yet. Oh, and to clarify, the part where I come to terms with myself would not be part of the story. It was a private matter in real life, so it should be nothing less than the same there.
And in other news, while I haven't yet asked her today, Naomi has made no move to give me my money for the internet, even though I had a dream to that exact effect just before waking up. Except some other guy was giving it to me, and before doing so asked "Who gets the bad news?", but I wasn't having a terribly great sleep anyways thanks to my room being too warm, which would explain the odd dreams. As well as this dull headache I have, which, coupled with the fact that I'll probably end up on drive through tonight, means I'd better take a Tylenol before work. New rules state the shift manager must always be on line, which would be Steve tonight, but after yesterday evening and Friday's close when that was hardly the case, there just might be a chance of things going differently for my last shift until Friday. Whatever the case though, I'm off to send that third email, then will probably just enjoy this last hour doing nothing in particular. It'll be like getting a head start on the next four days~