Karadur Inacu  (karadur) wrote,
Karadur Inacu 

Pointless Pieces of Mail

It's nice of them to go to the trouble, but really, I don't see why they bother. When I woke up yesterday, I went downstairs to find an account statement from the bank on the counter, and today, when I did the same thing, an envelope with a picture of a credit card on it that said "You've been approved!" or something to that effect. Setting aside that they really aren't all that unusual, I don't see why I need or continue to get them anyways. I remember back when I was trying to sign up for an account on Sympatico's site and was informed that completing the process would make it so that all communications were conducted online, bills included, so I had to stop. If Sympatico (and I'm sure many other businesses) can do it though, why not Canada Trust? Going back another little while, I went to the bank to withdraw some money, but was immediately confronted by a screen on the ATM asking if I wanted to apply for overdraft protection. I chose the "Ask me again later" option, as a rather particular matter of keeping things unchanged as possible, and then went off on the rest of my walk to work or whatever else I was going out to do. Then, a couple days later, I logged into Easyweb and was greeted with the same message. That time I clicked "No Thanks" though, and sure enough, when I went to the ATM after that, it went straight from the PIN entry screen to the one with transaction options. Therefore, there should be some option online to stop receiving paper communications, but either there isn't, or I just haven't looked hard enough for it yet. And the second is much more likely than the first. As for the credit card thing, well, if there is an actual card in there, then I will be displeased. I've not yet checked though, because it's both embarrassing and annoying to get undesired mail, and as such it is on my floor and will probably remain there until next time I clean up my room.

Regarding other things though, I'm still struggling with this feeling of boredom and things returning to normal. It is genuinely frustrating, because I want people (or at least one other person) to be able to identify with how I felt and feel right now, and for them to feel the same way themselves, but it's getting to the point where I'm starting to ask myself if it's worth the trouble again. One of the newer ideas I had recently regarding not understanding things and not getting along with certain people was to just stop having opinions. To stop saying (and even thinking) "I feel happy / sad / upset / uncertain" about literally everything involving other people would work to solve this, but it's also not a very practical solution. I want to rise above such things by being able to quantify and understand them. Not by refusing to think anything about whatever they may be. This came up in a chat in MSN not too long ago though, in such that other people simply accept things that make them uncomfortable and move on, which led the person I was talking to to say they don't understand why I can't be like that, and I don't either. It's like I can accept things as long as they don't have any serious impact on my life. I may not understand what goes into making (or creating) the various goodies I buy each time I go to Tim Hortons and / or 7-11, but it doesn't get to me, whereas these other things like, well, I really don't want to give any examples do because they affect me so badly. And to top it all off, I'm more or less subconsciously pushing those feelings aside now, meaning that I want to deal with them, but some part of my brain tells me "No, you can't think about that!" at the same time, leading me to being really tired such as I am now. I know that probably makes very little sense, and would be of practically no interest to anybody else reading this, but searching for a balance can be a remarkably frustrating thing.

Frustrating in a different way is how I caught up on only two of the several things I meant to do yesterday. One was leaving a couple pieces of feedback on eBay, and the other was finishing things up with an artist my commission from started on March 21st of last year. Ten months is close enough, but has it been uploaded yet? No, but of course not. I'd like to finish uploading the screenshots of my book first, but I can't rightly do those until I respond to two other commission emails, which I don't want to do yet because I have to shave (it's really bothering me this time) and go wash dishes soon enough. And then at some point I also have to find time to work on this book I was going to make out of my journal entries. Sometimes I wish I could just drop everything and start fresh, but no, I'll work things out somehow, starting with going to have a shower. By the time I'm finished in there, I should be able to go wash the dishes, and thereafter catch up on everything else. At least I hope~

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