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Slow and Steady Acclimation

So, I'm definitely becoming familiar with the sights and sounds of things around here. Every so often I can hear something go screeching by outside, which I might otherwise think is a train because they cause no end to problems with the TV signal reception, but I can say with confidence that it is actually a subway, simply because of the distinct noise, and fact that it keeps coming back every few minutes instead of being heard once and not again after. As well, we went out to the zoo today, and like last time, I fell asleep for a couple minutes on the subway ride home. Unfortunately this time, however, Dan Skunk ended up doing the same, but did I panic upon waking up because I didn't know where we were? No. I was almost completely certain that we didn't have to transfer to another train as that wasn't required to get out there, so I just sat and waited for Islington station to come up. Really, it's kind of simple and logical once you get used to it, and I might even dare to say that if I end up visiting a third time (the possibility of such has been alluded to, but it hasn't yet been mentioned specifically), I could probably get myself back to the apartment on my own. The only thing I would have trouble with right now is finding the subway platform in Union Station, because it feels like we went to a different one the first time I visited. At any rate, I do like this. I like knowing that if I wanted a bit of help getting to Zellers whenever I go within the next couple days, I could go down to the Islington subway platform, pay $3, board the westbound train, and get off at Kipling. Kind of pointless when it doesn't go the entire way there, but buses are always an option too. I will admit that it's different here though. Chatham is small enough that walking to any extreme of the city (Walmart or No Frills, I suppose) is no great feat, whereas to walk to the northern or southernmost end of Toronto from here would doubtlessly take the better part of a day, if not more.

But anyways, the zoo. While we didn't go to the gift shop first this time, we did go before the zoo closed, and I bought a couple things. Or rather I should say Dan Skunk bought them for me because he has a membership and thus gets 10% off, and I just haven't paid him back yet. So for what it's worth, those items were a plush snow leopard, as well as a teeny tiny miniature snow leopard figurine. Well worth it, but it's been mentioned several times since then that we need to go back on the weekend, because the big gift shop is apparently only open then, as well as one of the restaurants Dan wanted to visit only being open on weekends as well. Unfortunately for us (or perhaps I should say "unfortunately for me") I'm supposed to go back home on Saturday. I still really wish I could stay the extra day and go then, and I even proposed going to Via Rail tomorrow to see if I could get my return ticket pushed back a day. Unless the train will be absolutely full then, I don't see why they'd say no, and there's also another reason I'd like to go back twice in one visit. On the way up to pay today, Dan commented that if we went again, I might as well just buy / sign up for a membership, because that apparently costs ~$60, and general admission is $23 right now. Setting aside the eventual money-saving benefit of that, is it wrong of me to so want to go there and pay that $60? Seriously, the only reason I wanted to go to the gift shop is so I could buy things there to take back home with me and thus remember the visit by, and I have to think it would be even better to come home with a genuine membership card in my pocket or wallet. That way when somebody at work asks "So what did you do there?", I can have something tangible to show them for a change. I could even just go there on my own tomorrow, as I definitely know how to get there (take the subway out to the Kennedy station, go up to the surface, wait for bus 86A, get on, and wait for a while), but we'll see. That would be at least four hours of traveling by subway and bus, and I'd be lying if I said it didn't seem kind of pointless to go to the zoo but not actually go in. I still want to though, so yeah. We'll see once again, and even if not, I'll have another reason to want to come back a third time.

Regarding coming back though, I have also been thinking and wondering about what makes coming here different compared to going to London before and being invited up to stay for a week by a certain other friend, etc.. Regarding the latter, I think I disappeared on them because I wasn't comfortable with our friendship as it was, and didn't know how to talk to them about it. Going to London on the other hand was awkward as soon as it became a regular event, although I did still like going to the apartment down the hall to hang out with the people there every now and then. Ultimately I stopped going there right about the time I gave up on having friends before. As for here, now, I went on at length yesterday about how I feel like a part of this group, but I think more than that, it's just trying to be realistic about things. For example, I was near fuming mad with Dan last night because he knew I wanted to wake up at 9 and be off to the zoo by 10, and was up until at least 3 talking to people online and doing other things on his computer. That's one of the reasons I'm out in the living room writing this tonight (but mostly I'm comfortable here and see no reason to rush back into the bedroom). The point I'm trying to make is that bad things happen regardless of whether I want them to or not, and I need to work my best on dealing with those in a mature manner instead of just passively-aggressively trying to make the other person get the hint. That just leads to anger and resentment when they don't, and if there's one thing my experiences with friends has shown in the past, it's that neither of those emotions are particularly good when they involve other people.

I'm now cutting this entry off early, unfortunately, because I can barely keep my eyes open anymore tonight, and it's getting close enough to a reasonable bedtime anyway. Perhaps tomorrow I will write a more detailed entry about what we did this afternoon, but for now, bed. Even though by the time I get up and go into the bedroom I'll be wide awake again, it'll be really nice tonight <3

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