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It's Time to Write Again

I feel rather worked up just now. It's a few minutes after noon, and while I wouldn't normally be awake at this time, circumstances are different today. For one, Conner woke me up banging a toy around in his room. I took it from him, he objected (via crying / screaming), and I retaliated by putting some corn puffs in the empty Kleenex box Jen gave him, which seems to have him occupied. For two, we both laid down early (~2:30am) last night, partly for utter lack of anything better to do, and partly because Jen had an appointment in the morning, and wanted to get a decent amount of sleep.

Last week at this time, I was probably still in bed, feeling not overly great. I remember walking home from work on Sunday night, and having that stuffy nose / sore throat sort of feeling, and sure enough, come morning, it was all the worse. Jen was out running some errands with her mom, and I, after a minimal (compared to the usual) amount of deliberating, picked up the phone and called work to say I wouldn't be in. As you might see from there, I was sick, so Jen got sick, and while I'm feeling largely better now, she's not quite there yet. Part of me actually wonders if her being sick is anything similar to Manoah, in that smoking will make it take longer for them to get better, but either way, she's still sick today. That's the reason she cancelled her appointment, and as of this moment, she's still off in the bedroom, sleeping, and I'm out here in the living room... listening to Conner continue to bounce around excitedly, and make noises that I really wish he wouldn't because he's going to wake her up.

That's all well and good, but why am I worked up, you might ask? Just because of the way today is turning out. Not really having anything to do last night (I / we could've washed the dishes, but Conner was sleeping directly in front of the door to his room, and we didn't want to wake him up), my mind started wandering off to other certain things that could be done. We could even have done them together, barring Jen not feeling well, but even that can be worked around. She wanted to lay down early though, as noted above, and I did so with her, figuring that at best, I could wait until she'd fallen asleep and do whatever, and at worst, wait until she'd headed out for her appointment in the morning. Yeah, it's come up plenty of times in the past, and regardless of her mood, things usually happen, even if just for me, but I don't like it when that's all that happens.

In an unrelated direction, I'm also worked up due to lack of emails. All weekend I've been waiting for shipping confirmation of a few things. I decided sometime on Saturday that I wasn't seeing those because it was the weekend, and people didn't ship then, but even now that it's Monday, all I've gotten are a spam email, and some message from PlayStation Japan. Perhaps later? Yeah, perhaps, but it was frustrating to wake up and still not see anything. I'm also waiting for a reply to a commission-related email. The artist told me back on... the 13th that they'd added the details I requested, and would get back to me "asap". It's three days later, and I guess they're just really busy. It's kind of funny though. Back when the commission first started, the guy was all apologetic about a couple days' delay in replying, and I tried to tell him it was okay by explaining that I'm used to it with commissions. He said he hoped that he hadn't added to those experiences, and I assured him that he hadn't, and even though I do still feel that same way, it really makes me wonder if I'm not to blame in some way as well. He promised me a free picture for the delay some time ago, and it's just things like that. I really do appreciate it, but when the main commission remains to be completed, it's hard to emphasize something coming after.

I wonder what work tonight will be like? I work 5-close, and Orlando is the closing manager, so that's good, but I'm really not terribly excited for the shift itself, after the way the past several have gone. To go back as far as Wednesday night, it was quite slow then. I think because of the weather, but just when I walked in there, pretty much everything was done, and I was fine with that considering I still wasn't feeling very well. I had Thursday off, as I always do, and it began with some excitement when I woke up to find an email from Michele saying the kits hadn't come in, due to the snow. Then came the weekend though, and some rapid change in everything. It was busy. On Friday night, it took all the effort I could muster to get the dishes done to a point where, at the end of the night, we just had all the usual end-of-the-night dishes and other chores, instead of having some of it caught up already. It took us until about quarter to four to get out. On Saturday, I got a ride to work, because Linda had money for me. She wanted to drop me off at 7:15, but I asked for 7:00, so I'd be there early, in case it was still busy, and they wanted me to start early. Manoah was just coming outside when we pulled up, so I went over and talked to him, and could just see how tired he was in the look on his face. He laughed about something or another that one of us said, but apart from that, he was just ready to be done. He apologized for all the dishes at the back, explaining that they'd been busy all day, and I told him it was alright, picturing something not any more worse than Friday night, and said that I could probably just start early and get some of them done. When I walked in, I found considerably more than I'd imagined. And I still got them all done before 10:00, when Tom's shift (he was on drive through) ended. It took me being back there while they were however busy up front, but they got done, and because of that, and other efforts (even though Orlando told me I was working too hard, and to take a break), we were out at about 3:20. Yesterday night was probably the best of the three, but it didn't start out that way. Just... everything about the night, but once it started getting going, I noticed Jeremy was at the back getting alot of the dishes caught up, leaving the most annoying thing to be how customers came for the entire night in groups of three or four. I'm just getting tired, and I want / need a day off, but even that won't be quite what it sounds like.

To make up for not going to Heart and Stroke at all last week, I told Michele I could help out from 2-8pm on both Tuesday and Thursday this week. It'll be fine, I'm sure, and at least for Tuesday, I have something in mind to do afterward to make it special, but it's a bit daunting when I've only slept in one day this past week, and that was 'til 1:30pm. The more I think about it though, the more I realize it'll probably be nice to have work to do that doesn't involve rushing around and trying / hoping to get everything caught up by a certain time. There is rushing involved, yes, but the difference is that I don't expect to get all my work done in one day. If only actual work could have the same rollover idea...

There are a couple dreams from last night that I want to write about now, mostly because of the proper dream-within-a-dream feeling. I don't remember feeling like I dreamt the actual dreams, but I do remember dreaming that I'd woken up and was telling Jen about them, only to wake up again after that.

In the first, I was walking home from someplace. I can't remember where, but there was a distinct feeling of familiarity in the setting. I'd walked there plenty of times, and was familar with the route. It was a set of train tracks, which crossed a bridge over a lake, and onward from there. The walk was normal for the first bit, but as I got close to the bridge, I noticed there were no longer tracks crossing over it. Just a flat, grass-covered foot-bridge, apparently, which seemed slightly odd, but not enough to make me stop. I began walking over it, and as I came to the end of the far half, saw where the tracks had ended up. They were over to the left more, and crossed diagonally across my path, from behind me to the left, to in front of me to the right. The bridge had ended at that point though, so I was just walking on bare ground. Closer and closer I got to the tracks, and then I noticed. While there were supports for the tracks out in the lake, there was nothing on land, or at least not where I was walking. The track quite literally bowed underneath the train's weight, but still supported it somehow. The only problem with it was how the train was blocking my path. I could clearly see a path going down and underneath the tracks on the right, but I was carrying something (maybe I was on my way home from work?), and felt certain that I couldn't safely walk underneath of it, and waiting for the train to pass seemed preferable to trying to crawl underneath. Indeed, it ended soon enough, and on the other side, I found a few people flying model airplanes. They were up higher than I was though, as the ground sloped upward sharply, and as I tried to walk up the hill, I nearly stepped in a foot-sized hole in the ground, and onto somebody's airplane. I looked around to see if they had noticed, and sure enough, somebody off to my left had a concerned look on their face, but I tried to continue on, knowing that no damage had been done. Past that, I can't remember anything else that happened.

In the second, I was at work, at the back washing dishes. A manager came back to ask me to do something - the words they used made it sound like Orlando - and when I looked up, I saw Steve. He had this look on his face of "Bet you never thought you'd see me again", and I just stared at him, not angry, but being caught very much off guard at him being rehired after his previous performance. Fortunately, our staring didn't last very long, as that situation was enough to actually wake me up.

In the third, Jen and I had moved, which I say based on the surroundings being different, even though it still felt like home. The place we were in had wood walls, so it was nice and shady, and it was daytime. Evo was over, and I remember looking up at the corner as we heard a train passing by. For whatever reason, even though there were normal windows in the walls, one of the corners of the room was a window as well, and through that, we could see the train coming by, and the conductor inexplicably hanging on the outside of it. There was an audible smacking sound as he actually clipped the corner of the building, and I got really worried, wondering if he was alright. Then my focus shifted to how close the train tracks must be to the building for the train to come that close, and I wondered if it would happen again. Also in the same setting, I was laying on my back, and saw gold, oval stickers on the ceiling reading "GO" in the typeface used for that space in Monopoly. I asked Jen and Evo if they knew what they were there for, and I think one of them answered, but even in the dream, I couldn't make out / didn't understand what they said. One other thing I remember about that particuar place is that it was there where I woke up, and started telling Jen about the previous two dreams. Then I actually woke up, but she'll read this before I get to tell her about them properly.

About the only other thing I can think of now is that I should take some time to myself to relax / eat something / shave before I leave for work. It's already 1:30, and I'm still writing this... I know I want to go to the bank before work to deposit the money Linda gave me, but I also want to call the house to ask if there's any mail for me, and if there is, run by there before work to pick it up. Oh, and it's St. Patrick's day today, meaning that if I want to go look for certain similarly-themed things, today is the last chance I have, and I should go there before work too. It's going to be a full day by the end, huh? I'm sure it'll be nice though~